Does it really get that bad?

No, collicy newborn is certainly in my list of top 3 worst stages!

Yeah, they told me that too. My son was the easiest newborn. Ate great, slept great, rarely cried. That being said, I do NOT miss the newborn stage or the infant stage. It just wasn’t “fun” for me. I was mentally/emotionally struggling, trying to adjust to motherhood. It was a nightmare.

He’s 15m/o and he just gets better and better every day. He’s so sweet and funny. He has favorite foods, favorite toys. I can actually take him out and do activities with him, share my food, love and cuddle with him. It’s the best. Your complaints are valid, but no. It’s doesn’t get worse, it gets better.

People say that when they had easy newborns lol. I haven’t missed the newborn phase for a single second

I have an 18mo and for me, I’d take this age over a newborn any day of the week! An 18 month old can have tantrums, but they also know how to digest food without gas, SIDS isn’t a risk, he sleeps 10+ hours without needing to be fed or soothed, we can read books, we laugh together……it’s wayyyyy better and more fulfilling.

Nooo. No. Newborn stage was so rough for me, but I absolutely adore the toddler stage. My girl will be 3 in a few months and we are big time buds. She’s hilarious, it’s so much more fun to play because she has this stellar imagination, she’s on a pretty consistent schedule but can also be flexible if need be, she can verbalize her wants and needs, I could go on with the positives. For me it started getting more fun around the one year mark and it just keeps getting better and better ❤️

Each stage has its challenges and its gifts. If you don't like the current stage, there's another right around the corner.

If your baby has colic, you're parenting on hard mode right now but this too will pass. Try different formulas or elimination from your diet if breastfeeding. Try the football hold. Try Mylicon gas drops as needed or their daily probiotic. Put in ear plugs/buds to save your ears and sanity while you work through it. I found the gassy cries stressed me out so my husband would take over because he wasn't triggered in the same way and had a knack for bicycling the farts out.

You may find something that helps in the mean time and you may not, but hang in there because you have so many great things ahead: smiles, laughs, rolling over, sitting up, crawling, standing, walking, words, etc. Yes there will be a lot of tantrums in the toddler years, and those can be tough, frustrating days, but they're normal and there are still so many fun moments to help balance them. People will always have something to say about how much worse it gets, but dude, really, it just keeps getting better!

Something that helps my baby during diaper change is to hang a stuffed animal above the changing area that would play music and light up its belly. It had enough light for evening changes and was a distraction any time of day.

The newborn stage is the worst for me. Mines a baby, nearing toddler and infinitely better. Don't feel bad for not enjoying the newborn Era, it's so difficult. 

Everyone enjoys different stages. I’ve never heard a single person claim the newborn stage was the easiest. It’s hard but some people love it, some hate it. People will project their experience onto you a lot in parenthood but you don’t have to listen. There are things you should try to soak in like how his head smells, the little newborn scrunch, his tiny hands, warm little snuggles. Take videos and record those little coos. You will probably enjoy some things in hindsight and having recordings of things you might not remember is nice. Those things are gone in a blink. Many things will get easier. Your body will heal. You’ll get enough sleep again. Your baby won’t have colic anymore. He will be funny and sweet and smile at you. Try to remember everything is a phase- no matter how bad or how good it will change.

I have an easy baby and the first 6 weeks was hell. It was the worst stage by far. You don't need to try to enjoy it, just go into survival mode. You'll start to notice things over the next few weeks that make it better. Like smiles, a little coo or giggle, longer naps etc. Don't be afraid to use pacifiers and colic drops and also if you need to put baby down so you can stand outside for five minutes then do it. It gets better. Anyone who says the newborn stage is the easiest is either lying, insane, or has forgotten what it was like imo.

oh my god no. if you have a super easy newborn, sure, enjoy it. otherwise it’s hell. most people do not have an easy newborn.

i promise you 100% it only gets BETTER AND BETTER as they get older. i always tell new moms this. every few months you’re gonna be like, holy shit this is easier. my kid is awesome. and you’ll miss the squishy potato phase but not because it was easier. just because they’re cute. lol

I’m 2.5 years in and everything has been easier than the first three months.

Nah, a colicky baby is the worst. My life got way easier when they turned into toddlers. They are wild little boys, but they sleep at night!!!

My baby had reflux. Screamed non-stop for the first 8-13 weeks until we finally got on the right medications. I HATED the newborn stage. She just turned one and it’s the best days of my life. All smiles, giggles, no puke, no screaming, sleeps through the night. I promise you it gets better and I know everyone tells you that. And when you’re so sleep deprived, being told a “few months” feels like eternity. It goes by fast. You’ll be into brighter days before you know it.

She just turned one, I’m 20 weeks pregnant with number 2, and I’m dreading the newborn phase again. I’m so traumatized from it. And the longer I’ve been a mom, the more I realize that it’s actually normal to feel this way. Keep powering through it, I promise you, it WILL get better.

Fuck everyone telling you the newborn stage is the best. Clearly for you it’s not, so them saying that is just so incredibly tone deaf and dismissive. Almost like bragging actually. So seriously, they can fuck all the way offfff. 🤣

You are having a hard time. You’re allowed to be upset and complain. You’re allowed to be disappointed that you aren’t enjoying even the calm moments. I felt all the same things with a very needy baby and the constant guilt tripping from others about how I was feeling and the constant criticism with no real advice almost made me jump off a cliff.

To answer your question, no it’s never been worse than the newborn stage for me and I didn’t even have a c-section. Mine is 3.5 years old now so leaving toddlerhood and it has consistently gotten better and better and better. I certainly look back on her baby pictures tenderly and miss her, but never once have I thought “wow this phase is worse than the newborn phase, please let me go back I really took all the screaming and crying for granted.”

You are a rockstar. You will get through this. The other side is worth all of this. Definitely consult with a doctor about all of the crying and make sure everything is okay.

Newborn was my least favorite stage. There are hard things about every age, every kid is different, and every parent is different.

I had a hard newborn as well. She didn't sleep well and I think she had colic as well. It was freaking tough. I felt like it was hard to enjoy the newborn stage as well because I was so sleep deprived. It's okay to not be enjoying how hard it is. The thing is it's not hard for everyone. Some people have easy babies. It's really the luck of the draw. I have friends who had hard first babies and super easy second babies.

For me it got easier the older she got. Once she started sleeping better it was a different ball game. Because she wasn't really a hard baby in any other aspect other than sleep and also she hated driving. Every stage of a kid is hard though. You trade the hard sleep newborn stage for the toddler tantrums then you trade that in for a sassy kid to a rebellious teen, etc. It's hard to say what's worse because each person is going to have a phase they like more and dislike more. And their kids are going to be different in those stages. Some may have easy babies then hard toddlers then easy teens. Who knows if it'll be harder.

The way I survived the newborn stage was to keep telling myself it was temporary. Things would get better little by little usually.

No, it doesn’t. I hated when people told me that because I did not like having a newborn. So I was like… um, great. Also, not everyone who tells you that had a colicky baby, or they wouldn’t be. Because there’s nothing quite like a baby that can’t stop crying no matter what. And throw in c-section recovery… just know I feel your pain and things get better. Slowly but surely.

Two practical things: one, maybe try putting the heating pad down on the area before you do the diaper change next time for a few minutes to warm it up… mine was just super sensitive to temperature and that seemed to help a lot. Worth a try!! Also, may be worth looking into if your baby might have a dairy allergy or sensitivity. Ours did and getting him help for that helped a lot. He also had reflux that we ended up medicating him for (pepcid) and it made a HUGE difference. Hang in there mama, you got this! The best is ahead of you ♥️

Everyone always told me the opposite! During that first month everyone constantly told me, “don’t worry it does get better!” And I agree. The first month is pure insanity. It doesn’t get worse, it gets better!!

no newborn is the hardest. especially when you have a difficult baby. there’s parts of it you’ll love and soak those moments in but newborn is NOT the easiest

Haha. No. It does not get worse. You will miss snuggling the baby when they are running around and throwing things and you're trying to potty train them and they take off their diaper and pee on the floor at a Christmas party.  But the whole newborn stage, you will not miss, especially if your kid has colic. 

 Missing little moments is NOT the same as things getting worse. 

 Toddlers, teenagers, all things can be hard, but it is just not the same kind of hard as right now. My toddler had a terrible night of sleep last night and was up until 11pm, then from 4-5 this morning. But he sleeps 9 or 10pm to 8 or 9am most days. And most days, he takes a 2 hour nap at a fairly predictable time. It is absolutely not the same level of hard.  

 I can put him down on a pile of dirt outside and he walks on his feet. Also, he gives me kisses and says "I love you, Mama!". He puts on his own shoes. I can hand him his clothes and attempting to dress himself either works or at least keeps him occupied while I get ready. I can hand him a snack in the car and he eats it himself. 

 I do miss some things about the newborn stage, but definitely not the whole thing! 

  Edit: 2 words and paragraphs 

Fuck everyone who says “it gets worse” or “babies are easy wait for teenagers” or whatever else.

First and foremost, every person has different difficulties in life, baby or adult. One baby will eat well but have constipation, another toddler will sleep well but be a nightmare at the park, etc etc. There’s no Perfect Life start to finish.

Anyway my first was colicky, experienced moms doulas nurses could not calm him down. They refused to take him to the nursery at the hospital I swear to god.

He’s 2 now and calm, does great playing by himself as I get work done, sleeps well, etc. You could give me 10 million dollars and I wouldn’t re-do the three first months of his life right now. When we decided to have a second I said I only would if we got a newborn care specialist twice a week. Turns out second one is the easiest baby, but I KNEW alone I’d never make it with another colicky baby.

It is SO so hard to have a baby like that and people just don’t get it if they haven’t seen it.

My daughter was an “easy” baby, but the newborn stage was still the absolute worst to me. She’s 20 months now and I do NOT miss the newborn stage at all and it was by far my least favourite period of time. I keep saying “this age is my favourite” as she gets older because each month it gets better. I’d say things improved around 6 months and slowly got easier from there. Everyone’s experience is different but from my perspective, it gets SO much better.

FUCK 👏🏻 THE 👏🏻 NEWBORN 👏🏻 STAGE 👏🏻

It’s the absolute worst and the people that fear monger can kiss your ass

First few (maybe 6ish?) weeks were the worst. You are trying to recover, adjust to the new normal of taking care of a newborn, severely lacking sleep, and on top of it your baby has colic. Once my baby got through his colic, he was the happiest guy around. I loved the baby stage, hated newborn. It will pass in no time.

A couple things I'd offer for you to look into: 1) The football hold. Basically baby's head is on your arm near your elbow and their stomach is held by your hand. It is a recommended hold for babies with colic because the pressure on their stomachs can relieve discomfort if that is happening. 2) Loop earplugs. You can find them on Amazon for fast delivery. They don't block out all noise, just dim it. And come in a variety of strengths. You will still hear your baby crying, but it will be infinitely less painful to your ears. 3) Consider talking to your partner to get yourself a break. Like a break so that you don't need to hear the baby. Your partner could take the baby for a walk or a drive or anything to get you a break where you can relax without hearing them scream. Don't do chores. Rest, take a bath, anything to recharge yourself!

No it’s the absolute worst. Hang in there. Go on shifts so you can get at least 4 hours of sleep. Use formula if that’s what it takes.

It gets way way better, not worse.

The newborn stage was not something I remember fondly with either but especially with my first. I too had a C-section and a baby with colic. Turns out one of my post surgery symptoms was loss of appetite but breastfeeding, I had to get calories and nutrition so my doctor told me to drink a carnation breakfast shake as a meal substitute if I had to. (This was before ensure or other nutrition drinks) well, it turns out my baby was sensitive to cow’s milk and each shake was giving his little belly hell. My sister in law had similar issues with her kids and seeing the babies reaction she went out and bought a container of soy milk and gave him a bottle of it and he was a changed baby. Just like that he was happy and slept through the night and wasn’t gassy all the time. He outgrew the sensitivity when he was about a year old. His little brother never had a sensitivity at all.

I had a relatively easy newborn, now an 18 month old, and it’s still infinity times better. I always said that I can handle anything as long as I get a solid 7 hours of sleep and it’s so true, he throws tantrums now sometimes but I have the patience to deal with them because I’m well rested again. The newborn stage was so bad for me that I almost don’t want a second kid, it honestly has just gotten better each month since he was born. You are in the trenches right now but it gets so much better! At two weeks they don’t even do anything fun so it just sucks all around.

Also ignore this part if it’s overstepping, I know you didn’t ask for advice, but some things that I found helpful during the crying stage were the 5 Ss technique by Harvey Karp (there’s a book but honestly just the info on the website is plenty), noise cancelling headphones (I have a vivid memory of holding baby while he was screaming and inconsolable while blasting fall out boy into my ears at top volume and sobbing), yoga ball to bounce on while holding baby, and the period of purple crying website (helped me understand how normal it is for babies to cry and gave me time frames for when things would start to get better).

You are in the hardest part, in a year (even six months honestly) you will look back and it’ll feel like an eternity ago. You can do it! ❤️

I am expecting a second kid a boy and I honestly wish I could skip infant stage and give birth to one year old. My daughter is 2 and I enjoy talking to her and do all fun activities around town. All infants do cry sleep eat and poop and I remember being sleep deprived, angry, and very very bored

First time mom + newborn = not a good time

Now that i am a second time mom?? It is the BEST. We nap in the morning. I watch TV, read books, sit around, and hold my baby. I am 3 weeks pp. My husband meal preps my lunch on Sunday so I just pop it in the microwave.

I love it. My husband takes our firstborn to daycare. I have ventured out with the newborn to Starbucks and once I stop bleeding I hope we can explore and do more.

I would take a bad toddler day over a colicky newborn any day. My son's worse day now at almost 2 is still nowhere near as hard as those first 3 months when he cried almost 24 hours a day and refused ALL sleep.

Newborn stage was the hardest for me, even when everyone told me it was so easy! With my first son, I think I had PPA. Everything felt so intense, but after about 3 months it got better.

My second son is 6 months. He also was colicky, never sleeps, and has just now started eating every 2.5-3 hours instead of 1.5-2. I am just now getting back to feeling someone like myself.

To me, lack of sleep and not being able to put a colicky baby down long enough to go to the bathroom, eat, shower is wayyyyyyy harder than any toddler tantrum or behaviors.

I loved this quote, “It feels hard, because it is hard, not because you are doing something wrong.” It will get better. Day by day, then week by week.

For a lot week 5–8 is the hardest

Nahh. Everyone has different options and ages/stages they prefer. You're in survival mode, just gotta get through it. It'll ease up. 

I would probably have a third kid if I didn’t have to go through the first year of life again… but I do… so I won’t lol

You are in the screaming potato phase. It’s by far the hardest. I’m sorry and it will definitely get better.

Try using probiotics for baby. We used BioGaia and they were life changing. We thought our baby was colicky but these drops actually helped with gas/digestion. We saw a difference about 3-4 weeks in after using it every night. New born stage can be difficult even with an “easy baby” if you are a new mom because you are adjusting to this new life. Cut yourself some slack if you are not enjoying it right now. It will get better.

I have 3. First baby, first 6 months were the hardest part of parenting for me.

Nope. I cried every day when my baby was a newborn. 2 weeks EXACTLY I almost had a nervous breakdown from the constant crying and sleep deprivation (seriously ask for help because a baby will have a bish feelin cray cray). It gets way better especially when they start giving you kisses and hugs and smiles. The sleepy newborn cuddles are the best, but when you’re just trying to recover from all the trauma while they sleep it’s hard to enjoy.

This is the worst part of it but you’ll look back on it fondly which is why I think people tell you to enjoy it. If you’re not on the verge of having a mental breakdown then you have a lot of help and/or your baby sleeps through the night and you formula feed.

I think, based on my experience, every stage has its moments and looking backwards, you see everything through rose colored glasses. When my son was a newborn I was like I can't wait for x,y,z. Now that my son (14 months )is running around like a loon, climbing everything everywhere all the time and throwing tantrums when he wants something and doesn't get it, I'm like aw I miss that potato stage. But I think things get so much easier after like 6 months.

The newborn stage was absolutely not the best stage at all. I am more than happy to have my almost 3 year old who actually sleeps through the night and can talk and tell us what she wants. Also I don't have massive postpartum anxiety, and I'm not pumping any more. Each stage has different challenges. But the whole "enjoy every moment" thing is garbage. Yes you can enjoy your squishy newborn potato baby but you can also acknowledge that it's hard! You're going to miss aspects of each stage, that is probably true. But that doesn't mean that it also doesn't totally suck sometimes. you're human. you're allowed to not love every second of things and that's totally fine. We had an easy newborn in retrospect. But I had no freaking clue WTF I was doing, and we were at the end of the pandemic, so there were no mommy and me groups, no library storytimes, nothing for us to go to so I could learn how to interact with my child. So it was rough and lonely and anxiety filled.

I had mostly easy newborns and I still hated the newborn phase. Like, the snuggles are awesome. I would take a newborn curled up on my chest any day. But the rest? The breast pain, the body odor, the birth recovery, the leaking, the sleep loss, the night sweats, the hormone casserole... I'm getting worked up just thinking about it.

I cried so much!!! Like, hysterical crying.

I never want to relive that time for as long as I live.

My kids are 4yo and 9mo. 4 can be very trying with all the attitude and pushback, but they're super funny and awesome to be around. And the baby has a great schedule, she sleeps mostly ok, and she's busy learning all kinds of cute things like clapping and climbing and babbling and stuff. It's delightful!

The newborn phase is not delightful. It is hell.

It’s kind of a rose tint thing. Your baby will never be that small again, they don’t make the same little noises—that sort of stuff. I had a really easy newborn first go around and even I don’t miss the drama of it but I do miss it more generally. Same with my second who was absolutely a nightmare child as a newborn 😂 he’s six months now and I miss the little baby who didn’t want to be put down to explore.

But it doesn’t get worse per se. It just gets different! Each stage is its own with its own challenges and its own cakewalks.

Have a 3 yr old and 11 week old and I cannot wait for my baby to be older. He’s easy in some ways but I so much prefer the older baby / toddler stage to this.

There are struggles and glimmers of each stage. It can be really easy to be so focused on just getting through to the “good part” that we miss little moments . It’s a balance between acknowledging the hard but appreciating the sweet little moments.

People say so much crap. They told me I would miss being pregnant even though I puked for 9 months and couldn’t walk for the last 3 months. I do not miss it one bit. A coworker advised me to just eat carrots next time… there will be no next time 😂

I think this is the worst kind of “advice” to give new parents. It’s so negative in nature. My son is 21 months old now and while we have new challenges now, no part of me wishes I could go back to the early days!

You can definitely ook forward to your moments in the future when you’re healed and rested 🙂

newborn sucks, they forget the hell it is or they had an easy baby. Interestingly, you need sleep to form memories so it makes sense that many parents don’t remember the newborn phase! It’s also such a repetitive slog that days blend together and it’s really hard to remember much other than important milestones. I am 4 months in and have already forgotten a lot of it, I can’t remember our first night home from hospital at all! Four months in and it’s great, he’s happy, smiling, cooing, still not sleeping well but it’s tolerable. We took him to a brewery for lunch yesterday and stayed for hours, he just napped in my arms and was happy when awake. You have so much to look forward to!

Get some loop earplugs to tone it down a notch and hang in there. Be kind to eachother and yourself

I've had one colicky newborn and one not colicky newborn, and my opinion is that newborns are just hard even if they're easy. I was so sleep deprived there was no enjoying it.

No, if you ask me, where it's at is 3 months old and up. That's when both my babies started sleeping through the night (though #2 is going through a bit of a regression) and that made an entire world of difference. Also, both babies were significantly MUCH happier after they started waking up and becoming a little more responsive to the world.

The ones were fine. The "terrible" twos were fine. The only thing that has been a bit of a bump since the newborn stage has been four -- such an oh very passionate age. (YMMV, of course, everyone has different challenges at different ages depending on the child and the parent.) Even still, my oldest is one of my favorite human beings and I'm so happy to be her mom.

Like, do I miss them being tiny and little? Sure, in the way that tiny and little things are adorable. Do I lament the fact that it was physically and emotionally impossible to relish those moments as much as I do in better-rested hindsight? Sure. But I honestly don't think that stage was the best. The best is when they start becoming aware of the world around them and trying to interact, IMO.

My first was the easiest newborn ever and yes that was his easiest stage. I currently have 2 month old twins who are way more needy and cry way more and I will not miss this stage at all!!

I had a relatively chill newborn (no colic) and a good birth and I personally did not enjoy the newborn phase. Sure I miss snuggling and having her be so small and cute/not worrying about her getting into bleach etc., but things got exponentially better after the 4 month mark for me. There’s new challenges of course, but the newborn/no sleep/physical pain part of being a new parent for me was awful. It’s a huge life adjustment, and my skin would crawl when the baby would cry or fuss, constant overstimulation, each noise she made woke me up so I never slept; was too anxious to nap, wouldn’t take anything to help me sleep in fear of not hearing her wake up, etc., and so on. Hang in there, it’s okay to not love it, but there are some beautiful moments, their first smiles or laughs etc. and hold onto those to get you through this phase, it goes by quick but in the moment it doesn’t feel like it. ❤️

Different babies, different challenges.

For us, 4-6 months were the hardest (but the whole first 6 months were extremely tough overall).

I roll my eyes when people tell me to "enjoy it while it lasts". Newborn stage is no picnic and I think some people just forget how tough it is.

Doctor browns gripe belt and the “I love you” massage method. Don’t hesitate to lean on your partner. I had a severe pelvic floor injury and being on pain definitely is going to have an impact on your ability to sleep and tolerate the rough patches, but it gets better as the sleep gets more consistent and as the pain dissipates.

If your baby screams more when flat on their back, like when on the changing table or in their crib try to see if holding them for 20 minutes after a feed helps and not changing them right after a feed. My daughter has reflux and a milk allergy and this helped a lot with her.

I hated the newborn stage lol I do not miss any part of it

I tell new parents it gets easier when they can finally sleep through the night, because for me, that was the worst part of the newborn stage! Once I finally got caught up on sleep, everything felt manageable again.

My daughter had colic and nothing has been that hard. It gets harder in other ways her being almost 3 now she’s basically 15 😂 but would pick this over newborn phase

No no newborn stage was the worst so far. I have a three year old. He’s difficult sometimes but I would take age 1, 2, or 3 over 0–12 months any day. Hope this gives you hope!

My 3 year old made me cry this weekend because I was at my absolute wits end with her behavior and attitude. I’m also 35 weeks pregnant and just very overwhelmed.

no, seriously it gets so much better after the newborn stage. they sleep more regularly so you can also sleep, they start feeding themselves so you can eat together, they laugh and play and call you mama in the cutest voice possible. my 15 month old has been sleeping 12 hours a night since around 4 months. you will get time to yourself again! you couldn’t pay me to go back to newborn phase lol.

People that tell you this had easy (or easier) newborns. Mine had colic and latching issues. The sound of a newborn cry is SO triggering for me. Sure, some aspects get harder, like alligator diaper changes, but getting longer breaks between cries was suchhhh a relief. Sorry about your partners ears. That's INSANE. Also, for lurking soon to be FTMs, THIS is what people mean by "what else do newborns do!?". Wreak havoc, that's what.

Nope. I don’t miss the colick. I do miss the newborn days sometimes but the toddler days are so fun! Each stage is hard. Lol

My baby is only 7 months, but even without colic newborn stage is really rough. Baby just cries, eats, and sleeps (but never when you want to sleep). I had issues with breastfeeding and that was hugely stressful. Things were kind of up and down the first few months. But every month or so your child grows and changes so much, and new difficulties (sleep regressions, fussy phases, nap schedules) come with new skills and more personality.

We sleep trained at 4.5 months and it completely changed our baby’s personality. She used to get really fussy and difficult to soothe, typically in the afternoon and evenings. We thought it was teething but in retrospect I’m pretty sure it was overtiredness. She’s usually smiling, laughing, and happy…very social, lots of energy, very vocal. At 5.5 months she could sit upright on her own well and that also made it easier to just set her down to play with her toys. At 6 months we started baby led weaning, which is messy but fun because we’re really starting to see her develop tastes and preferences. She “dances” to her favorite songs, scoots herself in circles, loves being outside…

I just can’t imagine watching her become more and more of her own person is going to be worse than newborn stage. I think every leap makes my baby more fun to hang out with :)

1-3 months was great. Now he is no longer content to contact nap all day 😭

Everyone's experiences and opinions are different. Some love the newborn stage, others don't.

I highly, highly, highly recommend Taking Cara Babies, by the way. I know you aren't asking for help, but I know how hard the newborn phase can be and sleep deprivation is no joke. Taking Cara Babies saved my mind. I hope it helps you too. She has free blog posts and social media posts and she has classes you pay for. I really hope this helps you!