I think we are evolved to live within "groups" not "families"

I agree!

According to Joseph Griffith's biological theory of human condition, we're probably supposed to live like a community of Bonobos, so yes on "community"/"village" instead of just family.

I especially agree with this when I'm with my people, my chosen family if you will. We could be apart for five years, but the moment we met, we can talk for hours, about anything, and still have the same value.

I agree with this too. I always think of the saying “it takes a village to raise a child”. It’s never just your family that you need. It’s a wider community. And that benefits greatly if you’re unfortunately born into a family of arseholes! :) I love my found family very much

My family is my chosen family with only 3 blood relatives in it and a handful of friends

I think "family is important" is natural, not religious. Without family, we died.

I actually do value family very much. That's why it's so painful to have been forced to walk away.

I think it’s a bit of both. 

I think originally we needed the “family” for survival - babies needed the mom’s milk to live, the mom couldn’t get food for herself as easily and needed their partner - who would have been motivated by wanting a child to survive. 

But community was needed to thrive. Communities allowed parents to share duties, leading to more rest and more productivity. It also meant that people could survive things they wouldn’t have otherwise lived through - broken bones, disabilities, etc. 

As communities grew in size it also allowed people to take advantage of others. The cruel, the lazy, the selfish, the uncaring, the greedy, etc, were all eventually able to display these traits once a community was established and large enough. 

The community then would step in to support the children who weren’t being cared for adequately. Religion possibly developed or had a role in encouraging community to step up, but also trying to encourage the family to step up. 

Modern life is weird. We are surrounded by others and have community services available. But it’s such a large community that children who aren’t being cared for can be missed, and the community goes “others will take care of it”. The community is so large that the smaller family unit has to take care of itself. Unfortunately it often doesn’t. 

We make our own smaller communities as we grow and are able to be further away from the family unit.

Anyway. Just rambling 

I think people who have a healthy family benefit from having a family more than those who don’t. And those of us who didn’t are forced to make our own.

I've been reading more philosophy lately to help me battle my demons and an essay that comes to mind when I read your post is What is Enlightenment? by Immanuel Kant. There are many relevant passages in his essay that criticize religious apparatus or institutions but I'll just list one and if you're curious, I highly recommend you read more of the essay.

I have focused on religious matters in setting out my main point concerning

enlightenment, i.e., man's emergence from self-imposed immaturity, first because our

rulers have no interest in assuming the role of their subjects' guardians with respect to the

arts and sciences, and secondly because that form of immaturity is both the most

pernicious and disgraceful of all.

As this passage is taken from the middle of the essay, Kant starts off with explaining why he chose to analyze the religious apparatuses first instead of starting with the soveirgn powers that rule us. Kant states that "that(religious) immaturity is both the most pernicious and disgraceful of all". Immaturity, as Kant defines in the essay refers to "the inability to use one’s understanding without guidance from another". Kant also states that immaturity is self-imposed when its cause lies not in lack of understanding, but in lack of resolve and courage to use it without guidance from another".

In essence, religious apparatuses are bad because the people who are appointed are not able to exercise free thinking(when it goes against their reasoning) to the text they were appointed to repeat even if science and research contradicts. Many people go on to live their lives and have children without actual maturing thus repeating the cycle. They refuse to utilize their reasoning because it is easier to be immature and to be "guided" by these apparatuses. A group is definitely important to join whether it's with mature family members whom can think for themselves or leaving behind your immature family and finding that group that works for you. I do want to inject in my comment that I don't think religion is inherently malevolent. Like Gandhi said, "I like your Christ, I do not like your Christians. Your Christians are so unlike your Christ."

Just to spin off: but I think that younger Gen Xers and Millenials are now parents and we dont believe the same way Boomers and older Gen X do: mainly to honor thy mother and father. We value mental health more than the generations before us and just wont deal with the bullshit that our parents and grandparents did.

A these root issues still were around but our parents just "put up" with them for the sake of appearances. Religion may be a root but that was the way society thought in general. Society evolves and that thinking is well on its way to being eradicated.

Personally I think we dwell on these things because parental estrangement is not common as a whole. We're not only raised to believe we have the undying love from our parents who will always be there to protect and support us but we also are forced to constantly witness validation in our lives of this: by witnessing our friends and their parental relationships, by others reminding us and by our own relationships with our children. We KNOW that the way our loved ones have acted in the past are just NOT normal