My neighbour thinks if I threw a party, ten people would come. I’m literally in tears.
I live next to a Chinese restaurant and the new owners just told me “Neighbours never pay, never. If you have a party with ten people you let me know, I’ll sort it. You never pay.” I can’t believe it.
From the first bit, I thought they were refusing to serve you because neighbours refuse to pay.
This is the perfect way to ensure I'm too guilty to ever eat there.
This was my reaction, I’ll never go there but wave and smile and tell everyone they’re great. And please for the love of all that is good, don’t look at me, please.
This was my reaction, I’ll never go there but wave and smile and tell everyone they’re great. And please for the love of all that is good, don’t look at me, please.
This comment was so good I read it twice 😂
Haha, that would be hilarious as f_ck.
I just imagine OP showing up with his guests, all proud and boasting about his connections, and the owner screaming:
*No food for neighbour. You owe money. Never pay!
I'm glad to read I'm not the only one who understood it as "those fucking neighbors never pay!"
I thought they were venting, gossiping about the other neighbors
Used to live next door to a Chinese takeaway (and opposite a pub, why did I move?) and they'd give us the occasional free meal, the smell did make me constantly hungry though.
Lived above a fried chicken shop for a year at uni, also used to get free food.
Flat was always lovely and warm, which wasn't a problem until the summer when I couldn't open the windows as it fucking stank.
These last few years I've realised you're better with closed windows covered in reflective film, fans on and if desperate some bags of ice near the fan
Especially if you're in a built up area. When the weather says its 35 degrees outside all of the street surface will be double digits higher.
If the humidity isn't too high, you can also get a light cotton cloth and wet it (but make sure it's not dripping wet). Then drape it over the fan so it's blowing through the cloth.
It's not as good as an actual swamp cooler or air conditioner, but it's better than just the fan.
For pets and small kids, playing with ice cubes in an uncarpeted area can be a relief.
Did not even live next to one, but worked close to one, and they were always open much later than us. The amount of free chow mein and spring rolls I got that summer.
My dad taught a kid whose parents ran one of the nicest Chinese restaurants in the area.
Free food for life, well until they sold and retired of course. Then they started inviting us over for homemade buffets!
So many amazing memories of the most insane Chinese New years as a child.
That is incredibly wholesome! Tbh I'm more than a little jealous but it speaks volumes of the impact on the kid, and your father's kindness. This is how society should work.
Our neighbors had a Chinese restaurant when I grew up. We never got free food but when we went there there was always a hefty discount or an entree or two was “forgotten” to be put on the bill.
My daughter works at a Chinese chippy and she confirms they have a similar relationship with the guy next door - free salt and pepper chicken and chips each night.
I assume he’s built like a space hopper by this point.
Mr Hoppy!
I never done it. I only said I did it so they'd take me bellend out the chilli sauce!
Not every day you spot a Monkey Dust reference!
Jeez Mr. Hoppy delivering Chinese, imagine the carnage, pmsl
Looked down at my middle & thought "space hopper" ☹️
For free Chinese! Tell me where and when, I’ll bring the booze.
I was hoping there’s a bargain booze the other side.
Yes mate we’ll sort you with enough white lightening to knock down a horse
Got to the white part of your sentence and thought a real party was going to happen.
Just remembered a story in a bargain booze.
Me and my bro go in there's another group of lads in there and we're all looking at purchasing our tipple of choice.
Look around a few mins pick what we want but when we get to the counter the guy says in a thick Chorley accent 'sorry lads tills broke I can't sell you anything.'
We're like ok then why didn't you tell us when we came in? why are you open in the first place? Also are you going to tell those guys or just let them do the same?
The guy looked totally dumbstruck as if it just occurred to him there was no point being open, he promptly shouted across the shop 'lads you can have a look around but I can't sell you anything, tills broke.
The 3 guys just walked out with there booze and didn't pay, while the guy just looked at them confused 🤔
My Bargain Booze story is that I used to drive a clapped out, old Nissan Primera (which incidently was awesome to drive). The staff at the BB used to hear me coming and get my mine and my wife's tipple of choice ready before we even went in.
That tells you two things, one I drove a noisy, crappy car and two, we obviously drank too much.
I'll eat a meal! A succulent Chinese meal!
This is Democracy Manifest!
I see that you know your judo well
GET YOUR HANDS OFF MY PENIS
I’ll leave this here for the uninitiated:
Believe it or not, jail.
Ah yes, I see that you know your judo well.
That is an excellent headlock
I came here for this!
As I read that, OP never has to pay, but the 9 others will have to. So it's a clever way of getting all neighbors to bring in friends.
They already said the OP wouldn't have to pay. To then bring up a party, only to charge everyone else, makes no sense at all.
You think a restaurant is begging someone to bring in a party of ten to feed for free?
To be fair this seems like he's being genuinely nice to neighbours, don't get me wrong he would probably reconsider the offer if OP takes the piss but I think it's less begging and more strongly stating his beliefs about being generous to the community and the people around him (not sure if cultural or just his own personal beliefs but it's still admirable)
Also as a way of ensuring decent neighbourly relations given the smell and noise that there's likely to be from a busy restaurant.
I live 2 doors away from a Chinese restaurant. It smells soo good all the time! Definitely beats when I lived above a chippy! Now that was fucking rank! Stench of the oil and a wiff of fish the fucker had thrown out a few days before out back was so bad in the summer.
I think a restaurant in a residential area produces all kinds of smells and noises that a neighbour might complain about.
They're not begging.
begging
Apparently being nice to people is begging.
I don't think so. They're offering their hospitality. They're not going to charge anyone in his party.
My Nana lives next door to the Chinese. She gets free food and every kind of celebration, whether it be a Chinese one or an English one, they make a huge meal and bring it over. The original owner moved away and rents the shop out to the current people and they carried it on after the original owner told them. It’s become rather sweet as Nana works with fishermen so often gets free fish and lobster etc, so she gives them fish and she gets Chinese food.
A few years ago, I was doing very shit mentally and for about a week straight, their delivery driver was dropping food off at my door with a note from the owner simply saying ‘eat until better’. They only stopped because I rang and said I had too much 😂 they said to call if I wanted any more.
Perks of rural living?🤷🏻♀️😂
eat until better
That's incredible. What a lovely way to approach life.
It was one of the first things to make me smile in a while. They’re lovely people!
Moderator removed comment
16d
If you think the restaurant is so bad you're considering telling environmental health, why would you accept free food as a bribe not to?
Because the shitter it is, the better it is. It's a universal paradox that somehow always applies.
I still haven't forgiven the inspectors for shutting down the best kebab place in Reading just because it got 3 consecutive 1s on the inspections
Just moved to Reading. I need some recommendations. I got the worst kebab ever not long ago, the same night a pizza place just didn’t bother delivering 😡
I'm not super up to date as I moved from Reading after that happened, couldn't take that affront.
But second other best place was on Oxford road around the corner from the Nag's head,
I saw a kebab hut on a wander around the town centre yesterday but it looked too clean for my liking
German doner kebab? It's a chain, it's alright but yeah a bit too sterile IMHO.
Nah it was called Kebab Central I think? Near where the Savers is. GDK have let me down both times I have been there, given me the wrong meat both times.
I just want a proper boss man kebab shop lol
Town centre is too expensive for boss man now. This is the one I had mind https://maps.app.goo.gl/Rm5VU5nppGXTzu64A
Pathetic portions too. That was a once and never again order.
Kings Grill does a pretty good kebab in town, and also Ye Babam Ye out near cemetery junction
You are a legend
leaving the town in protest? that’s some real dedication to the kebab place. respect
The best Indian restaurant in my old town was shut down after a 0 star rating due to rat infestation apparently. But damn was their tikka sauce good.
The rats were doing the cooking.
Remy makes a mean biriyani
he really put himself into that biriyani
Blood, sweat, tears and anything else that came out of him
Ratatouille 2: Mousala
Rajatouille
They make the mint rata
Not sure about the raisins in the vegetable korma though.
I imagine rats swimming in the sauce like dogs in that beer in the Simpsons
I ate Indian food at a little joint in Texas and about halfway thru the meal, we noticed cockroaches were cooked into the food.
Just a little extra protein
Exactly. I have a local Indian takeaway that's dirt cheap, delivers less than 5 minutes after you order (swear to god that's true) and tastes great. Their food itself is crap health-wise, and I have gotten sick once or twice after eating there, but I still go back more often than not.
We've found a great Indian that delivers where we live, I've sworn to never visit in person in case it's an absolute dive. Ignorance is bliss.
(Homer to the party sub) "Oh. how could I stay mad at you?"
I've had some proper horrifying shits from eating at my favourite places, wont stop me going back though lmao
Rule of thumb is it's okay until you're peeing out your arse after a meal
My local Chinese is great but only ever had delivery.
Recently got a handwritten letter from them with a £10 voucher as they are closed for a two month “renovation”
Don’t want to Google their most recent hygiene report!
It's never true round our way. The shit ones are just ...shit
that only applies to the decor
run down shithole = epic quality food
smart, clean, recently refurbished = one step above a microwave dinner
food safety violations = well acquainted with the writing on the inside of your toilet bowl, armitage shanks who?
I call this the kebab house paradox
I laughed out loud at this, it's so true
City wok in south park seems to do alright. There's truth behind this
To be fair... If you've not worked kitchens you might not know how absolutely bad it can get. My friend is just starting a food business and the business next door is a Chinese, he's had to report them because he can see into their space out the back and they had open construction buckets full of frozen chicken defrosting outside. That shit can kill someone.
That's not even mentioning the amount of cooks and chefs I've known who don't believe in allergies and think washing your hands is unnecessary.
I've seen the state of a 5 star hygiene rated kitchen, and how bad that has been at times. The kitchens that get a low hygiene rating must be an absolute shithole
Let’s be honest for free food I would eat it off the floor as long it’s less than 3 seconds
It's a Chinese restaurant. The dirtier the establishment, the better the food.
Or more importantly HMRC.
I've become obese just reading this. Actually I was already obese. I guess I'm super obese now.
At least you're not being morbid about it
Nah I skipped the mordid obese stage.
Now morbidly a beast.
I think it's a proviso that you have to have 10 friends...and he is confident he'll never have to pay up.
Nine friends you pay!
Set up your own Chinese take away with them as a supplier.
I’d written a big comment about how dropshipping food could become the next big thing then realised deliveroo and justeat exist.. d’oh
And ghost kitchens
I hadn’t heard of these before, interesting!
I’ll have the kung wwooOOoOooo chicken please
Imagine one kitchen doing a bad job of 10 brands worth of food. Ghost kitchens are the worst.
It's not necessarily that though. Most ghost kitchens are based on an industrial estate or large cheap land area where they will have 10-20+ kitchens in essentially modular containers that you can slightly customize to your needs.
Some restaurant owners use them for expanded reach too, they can take their brand to the other side of the city by training some staff, renting a ghost kitchen and suddenly they've got a presence far from their main restaurant.
Sure there are some shit ones that are like that, just one kitchen doing 10 "virtual" takeaways, but they do work well sometimes. It's a sign of the times, various studies have different numbers but some say around 50% of the UK population order one or more takeaways for delivery per week!
My local chippy is at least 4 restraunts; fish and chips, burger place, burritos, kebab shop...each with its own name on deliveroo. I think its a bit shady and deceitful.
This is extra annoying as if you want to order off the other menu you have to order twice.
Twice the fees!
There are a few places near me that use these weird virtual brands from a company called Peckwater Brands. They operate 4 or 5 different fake brands alongside their own from 1 kitchen. They all look like they'd be proper chain restaurants but it's just the shitty restaurant's usual shitty food sold under different names. It honestly should be illegal, it's so dishonest.
but do you know what doesn't exist? A premium delivery service. A service that connects you directly to the driver. A service where you are the only customer for that driver. A service where it is guaranteed to taken from point a to point b with no messing about. A service where your food is hot. Sure, it'll cost you extra but it's worth it. Where I live we have delivery drivers that work directly for the takeaway. They are never late and the food is always and I mean always hot. Sometimes you have to let it cool down. Why are we paying £5 delivery for cold food?
Well said mate, I think this is a thing I can definitely agree on. The local Chinese, pizza place (independent) and fish and chips here in London in my part all do their own delivery service where the driver is waiting as the food is cooking. As soon as it’s ready, they’re off to your house.
The amount of times I’ve gone into the same establishments and seen orders for Deliveroo/Uber eats just sitting there on the side is all too common. As they just prepare the food and wait for the driver, doesn’t matter how long it’s been sitting there.
So yeah not only do the original chains get more ££ but you often cut out an expensive middleman!
I was saying this in 2018 when DD first started making its way into my area, I want real staffed delivery drivers getting the food directly and bringing it to me. It’s yet another thing where the cost has been pushed to the customer and the wage is set by the third party, and so the big company makes out, and the restaurants save money on labor.
Dropshipping chinese food lol
This is why we have to have terms and conditions and red tape!
When I was 16 I used to work at a pizza place next door to a Chinese restaurant. Once i got bored of pizza every day I befriended the lady that owned it and would swap pizza for Chinese food. She barely spoke English so I mostly went through her kids to translate. If I was ever sick she would bring me soup for free. One Chinese new year they had family visit from China and closed the restaurant for the weekend. She came and invited me to join them for a meal and let me tell you, the Chinese food we buy is nothing compared to what they cooked for themselves. It was 25 years ago nearly and I still think about her a lot. Hope you’re doing ok Mrs Choy.
Most Chinese take away food is pre cooked and frozen, sauces are all from jars. Go to the Chinese cash and carry in Croydon Wing Yip you will see sacks of pre cooked spare ribs and crispy chilli beef.
If my husband reads this we will move house. His whole mission in life will become living next to a Chinese restaurant.
Yeah I am definitely not showing this post to my husband! I can't even tell him I'm ordering Chinese, because the request list gets ridiculous.
I'd there a right move filter for "next door to Chinese restaurant"?
The most-needed Rightmove filter is "Don't show me a single fucking Park Home".
If I wanted a caravan with no wheels then I'd search for specifically that. Timewasting wankers.
I'd say 'don't show places with 'bedrooms' that I couldn't get a fucking single bed in' I hate estate agents
Moderator removed comment
16d
To be fair though, I mean at least near me, the Chinese takeaways are the ones that are usually cleaner and don't stay open too late, I'd be buzzing that it isn't a kebab shop.
Yeah, my local Chinese is pretty busy but it's never really noisy or anything, it's not like there's a queue of wankered patrons at 2am.
Found a lovely flat on a quiet side street, just off the highstreet. Was set on it. Fancied trying the little chippy…closed. Huh.
“Opening times…Friday 18:00-04:00”.
Ah. Fuck that.
At least you weren’t the guy that moves in knowing it’ll be loud and then try and get the council to make them close earlier due to the noise.
They know their audience lmao
We lived close to a Chinese takeaway once. They had a nasty old fridge that made a really annoying sound all the time, and the owner was always out on the street shouting and spitting late at night. I was glad when it shut down.
I rent a shop and the back of the row has three Chinese takeaways and they're grim as fuck out the back. All 5* hygiene but rank.
There is always an outlier:
https://www.getsurrey.co.uk/news/surrey-news/filthy-horley-takeaway-cooked-noodles-25694624.amp
I live near a sports bar. Every night bunch of wankers shouting "Ohhhhhh" and singing dumb songs. I have yet to receive my free beer
Or the weed grow-op in the attic. Does the food come with “garnish”?
There’s a bit of a cultural aspect to this aside from all the cynic responses.
It’s a cultural taboo to waste food. Sharing food is a huge aspect of many East Asian cultures. Generosity is viewed as a strength rather than a weakness of an individual and shows that you’re doing at least okay. Immigrants often communicates through their food because of language barriers so it’s part of the restaurant immigrant culture. Being an immigrant is a tough thing so you tend to be extra nice to get more friends and people to support you if things ever go wrong. They want things to be peaceful and nice with their neighbors. Who wouldn’t? It’s culturally polite to at least offer something back to show appreciation of course. Doesn’t have to be equal but a gesture of appreciation as you feel is appropriate.
A succulent Chinese meal?
If you really want to pay it back, make sure to pay attention to things like Lunar New Year and get him a gift! A food gift is usually best. Fresh fruit but expensive fresh fruit, stuff like that.
I'd be far too embarrassed to dine there and would insist on paying which would be an insult so I'd have to find a new route out of my house or move
I have an agreement with my barber for free haircuts and it's always a bit awkward if I want my beard done or something extra.
I have to force a tenner into his till.
I'd have extreme anxiety over trying to balance the thin line of abusing their generosity while not giving the impression that their food is not good enough. Just let me pay like everyone else.
Are you …. Me?
It's a good way of advertising. You get free food, you then recommend the restaurant to others.
What absolute legends. Now of course the classy thing to do is to A. Never take the piss and B. Find a way to reciprocate somehow.
But that's old school 'looking out for those nearby' and I bloomin' love it. Hope their grub matches their kindness!
For sanity sake don't just assume he means all the guests don't pay as well, they're not neighbours. He could easily be thinking they don't charge you for your food or booking costs but the other guests still pay.
Maybe not, it would be great for their neighbourly PR to be free after all, but don't just run on assumptions, a 10 people meal is ££££.
I read the statement as saying they'd cover the party of 10. Definitely worth checking before assuming though!
My dad's new neighbours own the local Chinese and they have never charged us more than a tenner, for what would usually be well over £50.
He also likes to drop in on an evening and bring left overs.
He's gonna get so fat lol
I remember living next door to a pub. Lots of free beers and the occasional lock-in. He was a cracking landlord and there was never any trouble.
I'd end up obese
Yeah, how would you ration it? Being a beneficiary of this type of arrangement would give me anxiety.. is once a week fair enough or is that taking the piss? What if you ordered from another chinese so as not to overdo it, would they be mad? lol I would tie myself up in knots over this.
How long would you keep getting free food and not start paying? Seems like a super cool way to get all your friends introduced, and maybe use the gesture if you need it, but seems like people would end up paying as they should.
How could you not be cool back to someone like that. Right next door too, so easy for people to go in or pick up.
Ooh lucky you. My experience of living above a Chinese for years was quite different - no freebies and they almost killed me when they closed up for the night but left the gas on and my flat filled with gas.
Neighbours never pay..since they're dead.
People are very cynical these days, he‘s just a nice neighbour and wants to give you free food. How lovely.
Please don't exploit this person's generosity. Repay it in kind.
Sounds like that business owner knows the value of good community relations. I once took my PC into a small business owner repair shop. Just one guy, working his butt off. He diagnosed the issue after a week, and I got daily text messages from him apologizing for not having the job done yet. He finally called me in, told me what the issue was, told me he couldn't repair it due to the replacement part being more expensive than a new unit, and kept apologizing. I assured him, it was OK, I was just happy knowing what the problem was. I asked him what I owed for his time, and he wouldn't hear of taking any payment since he was unable to fix the problem. I explained that the time he'd spent diagnosing was reason enough for payment and this was his answer: "You don't pay of its not fixed. You tell friends, family this. Community has to look out for each other."
I was blown away that he felt this way and walked out with a broken computer and a warm spot in my soul. I did tell people. And he has had my repeated business since then.
This sub should be renamed r/CasualRacismUK
After reading all the comments on this post, why are people so cynical about a nice gesture? Because it wasn't said how a native would say that phrase in perfect English? Why are people so suspicious? Take the stereotypes and racism out of your head. I know a Chinese family who work extremely hard for their business to thrive, they work extra long hours preparing, cooking and cleaning. It's not fair that people are so quick to judge.
When’s the party?
You should respect their decision, paying a cash tip to the value of your order. Tell them that their prosperity is one of the foundations your neighbourhood.
Dude. You have got to be hella cool to these people. Always offer to help out in little ways or if you’re sweeping in front of your place sweep in front of theirs too. That vibe is so amazing you gotta protect it
Sweats excitedly in MSG
Easy there Uncle Roger!
Now that's more fucking like it. Used to live above a bakery that did the same thing for me. Would sidle down and a pie with a bacon sarnie would be waiting for me behind the counter. Still drink with the guy occasionally. Top bloke.
When is the party please?
N'awwwww how nice. They sound lovely!
Our Chinese neighbours owned a takeaway, and always gave my dad a huge discount. He was always wary about taking the piss though, tried not to go too often, also mowed their lawns and stuff for them as well. Lovely people.
Unconditional generosity should be rewarded, or at least praised.
Asains are a very kind and generous people!!!
I used to work next door to a police station. And I always thought they'd be cool to us because we were neighbors. But NOPE.
Bring the oldest lady there flowers and almond cookies and you will be adored, sit and gossip with them every now and then about the other neighbors in a quiet tone and you will be practically adopted.
Source : Lived next to a Chinese restaurant for a few years.
My wife is Chinese and they are the most generous people if they like you, however I wouldn’t take advantage of this too much, I would feel bad. Either that or do things in return and they will be friends for life.
Okay, party at OP’s place and Reddit is invited :)
My reaction, back when I was a student-“I am going to live! By the Gods who shine upon me, I WILL live!”
We all coming round yours for a Chinese then?
Don’t overdo it and do some random good neighbour shit for him once a month as a kind of thank you, even if you haven’t eaten there recently. You never know when uou will NEED to feed yourself or a friend when shit goes sideways
I live in a pretty small town and one of the things I most appreciate is the wholesomeness ,I could go on a 7 hour rant about each pub and restaurant that would treat me so kindly and do the sweetest things when i was younger (and now)
I worked in the plaza of a Chinese owned restaurant like this. They never made me pay so I always tipped the bill. Sometimes, I didn’t have cash & would give it the next day. They also fed the homeless in the area. Protect those family owned businesses at all costs!
My dad worked for a Chinese restaurant in Virginia Beach (he's a white guy but eventually became a cook). Worked for Mr Park to pay his way through school. We'd go by and see him once every 3-4 years and Mr. Park always gave us the food at cost. The nicest guy, he retired sometime around 2005, I still miss going there it was authentic Chinese not the Americanized version and it was heavenly
Be sure to tip generously.
Buying your silence.
Can I come? :)
Landed on yer feet, learn a wee bit mandarin, get to know them 👏
Party round yours then mate?
My friend used to do deliveries for a Chinese takeaway, always came home with loads of free food at the end of the evening, they said they’d rather give the food away than bin it but my friend says they’re just shit at managing things and always cook too much lol
Lmfao this post wholesome af
A lesson I have learned is that a good neighbour is invaluable. I'm not big on socialising and making friends, but I'm nice as all hell to my neighbours
You must always offer, though. That’s what respectful neighbors do.
Our uncle lived next to a take away and he never had to pay for anything. They shared cooking secrets with him and even showed him how to adapt their recipes to allow me to enjoy take away style food with my dietary needs. They brought home things from their holidays for him that we inherited that are beautiful, carved jade figures etc.
Now that’s what I call a succulent Chinese meal.
You should support them as best you can, they sound like good folks. If each of us spreads kindness and community instead of division and globalisation, we might actually survive the next 100 years.
I lived above an Indian take away and I’d only order from there maybe once a month, after the second time they discovered I lived upstairs and told me off and from then on I’d order enough food for myself and would get bags of food from them and they’d charge me £5. Every time.
For a small family business, that’s so kind of them, 10 people’s worth of meals is so much money these days
I think it’s safe to say that you now have ten friends.
Unless they only do battered chicken balls and not Cantonese-style, in which case I’m not coming round.
Seeing as people can't stop being racist I've locked the thread. Let's play nice next time.