Can you remember a time in your life when you were truly happy?

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The happiest I've ever been was between March and May of 2020. I was totally and completely broke, single, and unemployed.

Every day I cooked up a big breakfast, took the dog for a long walk, and went for a motorcycle ride. I tried to learn how to paint (not well), I was reading 2-3 books a week, and doing some writing. I started brewing mead at home and got really good at making pizzas from scratch.

I was so broke that I once found some unopened beers in a dumpster and took them home and drank them. I was selling my furniture on craigslist like a crackhead to be able to pay rent.

I made a few bucks because I had good friends who hired me to do projects around their houses. I was too proud and stupid to apply for unemployment for the first 6 weeks or so (not applying immediately was one of the dumbest things I've ever done). Then I didn't have a choice.

But I was happy. I had leisure time, I had hobbies. I was free. I was stressed about money of course but pretty much nothing else.

Then I got a job and it all went down the drain. These days I have no free time, no energy, no hobbies, no passion. And I'm still stressed about money, that never ends.

I don’t think i’ve been lucky enough in this lifetime to have any amount of years straight where things were picture perfect. Just good and bad memories gliding through the track of my life rollercoaster.

20 was amazing. I had just gotten out of a bad relationship and was about to study abroad in Asia. I remember sitting in the airport thinking "Everything is actually going my way for once".

I'd say from 33-38. Those years were friggin' amazing. Life isn't bad right now, but my 30s... wow.

Not everything in life is perfect, sometimes families or friends can cause drama, sometimes work is a pain, sometimes the economy struggles and your finances with it. Luckily I don't need things to be perfect to be truly happy - I can honestly say that I find myself happier and happier as the days go on, year after year I strive to improve my life, my relationships, etc. and I ultimately end up having a better year than I did previously.

Or to put it another way; I would not trade these moments, these years, for any previous ones.

All of them.

None of them have been perfect. But all have been happy

I was having some real bad insomnia and spiraling intrusive thoughts and I used a memory of my happiest time. I was about six or so and waking up at my grandparents house. I recalled the smell of the bread and eggs and my grandfathers coffee. Then going back upstairs after breakfast with him so he could show me his new computer (this was approximately 1986-87 so this was a real novelty). Then he left me with this super basic hockey video game to play while he and my gramma did stuff around the house. That memory is the happiest most peaceful one I could think of and it really helped me step back from the sadness I was feeling.

I think after 20s you have to adult nonstop, which is a killjoy

One of my happiest moments some 10 years ago:

A buddy of mine named Mark and I booked a handful of shows up the California coast as songwriters. We stopped at a bar before our first gig and the owner noticed our guitars. He offered free booze if we played at his spot after our first gig at some lame winery.

We show up at the bar. There's no PA but the place is packed. The patrons gathered around us and Mark and I end up trading songs for about an hour while we're getting pretty lit. We were a hit.

Elated, we run through Morro Bay looking for a place to eat, stumbling, laughing, as free as we could ever be. I can remember Mark's cowboy boots stomping through the quiet coastal town at around 10pm.

We grab some McDonald's and are off to find another bar we were told was still open. There's a beautiful gal sipping a cocktail who I don't think will give me the time of day if my life depended on it. I cozy up anyway while ordering another beer. I make some philosophical quip and suddenly we're rolling, talking about our love of the religious philosopher, Huston Smith. We hit it off and exchange numbers. We would end up chatting over the next few months before the spark would fizzle and I foolishly start dating another gal back in LA.

But that entire night remains the most free I've ever been in my entire life. I felt wild but in a beautiful way. The memory used to make me sad. I'd think of that night and how I wish I could teleport back to that moment. Then I realized that those moments are reminders that it can happen and sure as shit happen again. Amen.

“Life is an endless series of train wrecks with only brief, commercial-like breaks of happiness.”

― Deadpool

I'm gonna comment but will sound like a downer. My life has been one sad trauma after another. Physically Abused by a family member when I was 3. Family was rich and lost everything in 08 when I was a teenager which took a toll on me. Parents put me in debt without my permission and destroyed my credit before I was 20. Got married and she cheated with my best friend. Got divorced. Was dating again but was so scared and scarred I postponed having her meet my parents. Well my dad died tragically and never met my new wife. Got remarried. But she's been very ill right afterwards for almost 2 years now. Our marriage is pretty stagnant now. Try to be a good friend to "my friends" but drove by and saw all of them with each other for dinner and we weren't invited. Happens consistently. And my family never has time for us. Bits of my life have had happiness, like certain events, but I can't recall being truly happy since I was a child (when the abuse was blacked out).

I'm pretty happy now in comparison to my youth but there was about 6 months where I was truly happy.

I got someone pregnant on our first date. I was stricken with terror and anxiety about what this meant until our 20 week scan.

The baby started to actually look like a baby and I looked over at the girl I got pregnant and she looked so vulnerable and scared during the scan. I knew I needed to step up and I started to get big feelings for her at around that time.

Ive suffered with anxiety for about 15 years before this and whenever I have a panic attack I've never had a place that makes me feel safe. I had a panic attack on a night out and I just wanted to be with her, drove an hour to see her and immediately felt relaxed and safe.

I told her I loved her that night, the first time I'd told someone outside of family. And the relationship we built over the next 6 months was amazing.

Shes now my wife and we have 2 kids and I'm so much happier than I've ever been but those 6 months of getting to know each other in this whirlwind of having a baby was incredible.

Possibly back in middle school. That was certainly the best part of my life, but I can't remember if I was actually happy or if I was still unhappy, I just had enough going on that I could find joy in some other things. Regardless, it was twenty five years ago and I don't really remember it too fondly, I don't take solace from my childhood. I just acknowledge that in a shitty life, that was the least shitty part.

I’m happy now, but my life philosophy doesn’t revolve around things being perfect, it revolves around things being good enough.

I never liked the idea that life is just happiness all the time. I believe you need challenge, mental stimulation, and you need to get through failures and become better on the other side.

No, not really.

27-33, maybe 29-33

Finished the uni (which took way too much and a toll on many parts of my life) started to have money of my own and finally managed to go live on my own. Having money led me to start doing things I actually liked, meeting new people thanks to that and live life as I though I've should during my uni years.

I still remember one particular day leaving the bathroom from a pub I was with some mates, looking at me in the mirror and thinking "this is actually fine." Rose tinted glasses and all that, but I can't really recall other day in my life where I would think something like that.

Of course, during that time I didn't realize I was in the good old days, but such is life.

From then... things either continued or languished and worsened. COVID didn't hit me the way most people got hit (I was fine during the lockdowns, it was after that and how relationships had deteriorated that really fucked me up) and things... I don't know, let's just say that life hasn't been very kind with me lately.

2008.

For me happiness comes in sections. There was never a whole happy time, but small periods of happiness amongst a big mess. For example:

Skipping school to play final fantasy 12

Going to a Lan House to play online games on an afternoon

Listening to my favorite artists albums for the first time while walking in the park

The day I officially finished university

I mean, as I recall there are fragments of happy moments on my mind, but unfortunately the macro vision is that I've always been depressed my whole life.

Burned my arm because I wanted to harm myself when I was a teen, also thought about suicide.

When I was 20 and something, I had to literally run to the psychiatrist because my mind was unbearable.

All the shit I had to take on work during all these years.

And the list goes on and on.

I will turn 34 in some months, I concluded that the majority of the remaining time I got left I will be miserable, but the meaning of life is having the dexterity of perception when an opportunity of a happy moment appears and learn to deeply enjoy it.

I'm almost always happy, learn the golden art of not giving a fuck and strive to your goals. An example of this would be I own multiple businesses. Something would happen at 1 of these businesses that cost me a fortune. I don't dwell on the fact that it happened. I simply look at what happened, if it can it happen again, and how to fix it now and prevent it in the future. Logic and ration are all that are needed, not emotions. Second, you get emotional, you get stressed, then become unhappy. One of the next biggest pieces of advice I can give you is cut drama from your life as quickly as you can. You make a new friend, and they're always in drama or bringing drama in your life. You kick their ass to the curb. You start dating a new woman who brings you nothing but stress. Kick her ass to the curb. You start working a new job and it brings you nothing but stress, start looking for a new job.

Simply no, I don't think I'm wired that way.

I’ve always been happy. I’ve had really rough years, but I was always happy

Right now

2003 age 23

When I was in my 20s I was hitchhiking around being a road hippie without a care in the world. I didn't carry a single key because I had nothing to lock up. It was the most freedom I ever felt and I had a great time wandering around, playing my guitar, and being around friends.

I made enough money by busking to never go hungry and didn't beg or panhandle.

Of course, that wouldn't work out very well today. No one carries cash anymore.

The summer when I was 27 - had just quit a stressful job that was mentally destroying me and was working very part time while teaching myself programming for a career change.

There's nothing like that pure blissful feeling of freedom, time being your own, and no looming thoughts of what is waiting for you back in the office. 

I knew I was going to be working full time again soon enough, but I sure enjoyed that while it lasted.

I don’t know what that word means. I had to google “happy”

When I first became religious and cared about my religion. I felt completely peaceful, was content. Life had hiccups, but I accepted them.

My 30s have generally been very good. The worst times I had were all due to work-stress and horrible supervisors.

Honestly? I think right now is the happiest I've been in my life. Things aren't amazing financially, but I'm moving in a positive direction and I really like who I am, and feel good about how I want to spend the rest of my time.

It's hard to say when life was a "golden time." I think my time is echoed with another person. COVID lockdown was amazing. I woke up when I wanted, and did what I wanted, when I wanted. I love my job and went back to work a year later. But every day I crave the freedom to not be tied to going to work. So now, I'm saving as much as possible to retire early. Then I can have a taste of that life again, for hopefully the rest of my life.

Not really. It’s just an endless loop.

Playing Goldeneye 64 with three of my friends.

Life on this side of Heaven doesn’t get better.

I remember a time during my senior year of high school and shortly thereafter I was the most chill I had ever been in my entire life and people saw that. I really truly miss that guy. Seems the stresses of life sucked that out of me once college began, again in the military, again when I was married and now being divorced and old. Damn this post sucked it out of me. 😕

I worked as a camp counselor 2006-2009, as far as a period of time that wasn't perfect but tremendously joyful this was the time. I'm married and have a kid, dog, career, and I am happy with my life, but it is a different kind of happiness - one that is marked by major milestones, successes, and responsibilities. Being an underpaid goofball who had the bare minimum of expectations placed on me was incredibly freeing. The off-season was incredibly depressing, though. 10-12 weeks a year I felt like my true self.

I feel like my true self now, but I wouldn't know what that feeling was without that experience.

I just got my taxes done yesterday and it feels great to have that pressure off.

honestly, it's since we bought our condo in 2019. covid was narly and there were other stresses, but in 2020 things evened out because we finally had stable housing. we have had money and time for enjoyment, my wife got a new better job and now she's happier. i even had a bad injury (broken back) early this year and it hasn't dampened my feeling of this "golden time".

What year were you 24?

The happiest year of my life, without a shadow of a doubt, was the year I went backpacking in Australia with my best friend in 2008. A time of unparalleled freedom and adventure, filled with wonderful characters and constant laughter.

There's just nothing that will ever come close to it. While I look back fondly on it, I do feel a twinge of sadness that my life ever since has been so devoid of that care-free exuberance that comes with traveling in your early twenties.

26 to sometime in my 30s. Met my wife at 26, fell in love and was truly happy. 32, we had our first child, and was happy but that also marked the end of our care free happy days.

Barely

Wow this is a really great question now that I think about it. My 20s were grueling, yeah I had a lot of sex and hook ups with multiple women, but that was the only good thing, since I was financially broke, struggling in school, and in debt still living with my parents. I want to say 31 to now (I’m turning 34), I moved out of my parents house, and learned to live alone in my own studio apartment for 2 years. I moved in my partner last month and while I enjoy it, nothing compares to those 2 years of truly being by myself and just being self sufficient.

now?

22-32 or so. I'm sure there were days I was unhappy, but the overall arch of memory of those years are happy and positive.

A few times:

• In general, college (undergrad) was quite a happy time for me. There were ups and downs, of course, but it was overall quite good.
• The time period shortly after college where I had roommates who were also friends

A few specific instances where I was happy -- even blissful.

• I was 16 and had just made out with a beautiful, smart, cool girl at a party. We sat cuddling on a couch, and I don't think I'd ever been as content as in those minutes.
• When I learned I would be having my second kid. Of course, I was excited to have my first kid, but there was some feeling in knowing that I was about to have another that made me very happy
• Making out with my now wife for the first time, and our relationship forming over the course of a few months

Yeah! From 25.5 to 27.5. Nothing was perfect. But I was broke during my Master’s but working really hard, seeing a payoff from that, I had a vibrant social life, great, stimulating friendships, (frugal) travel, and I felt at home where I was living for the only time I’ve ever felt at home anywhere. There were challenges but I overcame them. It was how life should be, busy, fulfilling, stimulating, challenging and overall a positive experience. I think about it a lot.

Every moment we choose whether or not we want to be peaceful. Sometimes I choose happiness, sometimes I choose misery. This is what a well balanced adult life is. Yin Yang. Human yet eternal. 🤍✌️