Essentially, when it comes to a relationship, do political beliefs matter to you more, or cultural similarities?
Would you rather date someone who is of the same culture as you but has opposing political beliefs, or someone who has similar political beliefs as you but is from a very different cultural or ethnic background?
Definitely shared political beliefs, different culture. Easiest question ever.
I have been married for going on 25 years and I can honestly say that I would rather date a fucking cannibal than a right winger.
Why? Because with a cannibal? All we have to argue about is what’s for dinner.
Who’s* for dinner.
On her side of the argument? You are right….
What, you’re not going to adapt to your SO’s dietary preferences? Okay, good luck then.
Absolutely not. I will fight her…no pun intended…tooth and nail….but it is Still better than arguing with a Trump Humper.
Yeah well, meat these days costs an arm and a leg, but if you’ve got neighbors, arms and legs can be free.
Picky eating habits aside, I agree with your main point. If you asked me if I’d rather discover my wife was having affair, or that she was a Trump supporter, I’d probably go with affair.
I have had a wife who had an affair, the basest thing about it was(in my case…your results may vary) was that she was so paranoid over me finding out, that she became domineering and controlling….
By the time I found out about the affair? I had had enough of her bullshit and gladly left.
Oof. That sucks.
Not really. I remarried, have two great kids and 7 grandchildren. My wife and I are now retired and going on our 25th anniversary next May. My only wish is that my wife wouldn’t have needed a hysterectomy. It would’ve been cool to have a biological child. But, that wasn’t in the cards.
My wife’s two kids think of me as their Dad because he has nothing to do with them….and they know I am not their father…our son was 12 when I came into the picture and our daughter was 5.
Being a step parent is an interesting journey. To go from “who is this guy?”, to “You’re not my Dad”, to getting a grandchild named after you was a pretty rocky path sometimes.
I don't care about ethnic or cultural background differences except for when they influence political beliefs. Like, if your cultural beliefs encourage some kind of discrimination against a group, I'm obviously going to have a problem with that- but if a person with that cultural background has the same political beliefs as me, that means they be going against that aspect of their culture to oppose that sort of thing anyway.
So yeah, same political beliefs 100% of the time.
I would kick Jessica Alba out of bed if she wore a MAGA nightie.
Unless said person wore it so I would take it off more quickly lol
Dating someone "from a very different cultural or ethnic background" is fun. It is an upside.
You get to learn about them and their culture! You get to try their food and visit where they are from with someone who has an insider's perspective! You get to experience the world through their eyes!
It is wonderful!
Yeah! I have a native Hawaiian friend (He currently lives in Minnesota) who wants to take our friend group to Hawaii some day and I really hope that can happen.
100% same political beliefs. And the different culture/ethnic background would only be icing on that cake for me.
A different cultural background is a much smaller hurdle (I even have trouble describing it as a hurdle at all) than opposing political beliefs.
Unless you're a bigot, how would a different cultural/ethnic background be a negative
I didn't see it as necessarily bigotry.
Can create tension with raising children if one parent wants X and one wants Y. Religion is often a hot spot.
Even cultural dietary restrictions can create issues for the couple.
I didn’t think about religion but that would definitely create significant friction
It creates more challenges than most people realize, and can especially create unexpected challenges when children show up.
What punishments are appropriate, how much free time a kid should have, how much time should be spent in organized sports, how much time should be spent studying, how much time should be spent learning an instrument, how much input a child should have in all these choices, etc..
That seems alot more like different parenting styles much more than different cultures.those same arguments can happen between any couple without a unified parenting style.
Parenting styles differ greatly based on culture.
If you live in an area with a lot of immigrants from different places, go visit the sports fields some weekend. Then go look up after school SAT training centers. Then go visit a local boy scout troop. Then go to an academic competition of some sort.
You’ll notice different races (race and culture aren’t the same but there is a high correlation) are more common in different activities.
Geez. Straight to the bigot accusation. Just like a lefty.
I didn’t call OP a bigot. I asked for other options. I assume they have a perspective that I can’t understand from their original post. Fuck me I guess though lol
The more the terms racist, bigot, misogynist, homophobe etc are thrown around, the more they lose their effectiveness. Those terms become just another word. They don’t bite anymore.
I wasn’t trying to bite anyone. I was asking a question. Do you have an answer to it like others or are you just here to try and police my word choice?
Edit: nevermind, just saw your flair. You’re here to ask me questions. If I wanted your opinion i would ask it over at r/AskConservatives
Free speech. Say what you want.
someone who has similar political beliefs as you but is from a very different cultural or ethnic background?
Easily.
My political beliefs are WAY more important! I love it when my PoC friends share their culture with me. I have more things in common with a leftist Ethiopian, Hungarian, or a Korean than an American conservative.
Shared political beliefs, different culture. Hands firmly down.
Similar politics, different culture
Shared politics easy. I'm friends with people from different cultures and ethnic backgrounds with no issue. It's irrelevant if our cultures are different.
Different culture, shared political beliefs.
Political beliefs are more important in this case. I actually prefer dating people from different cultures. Also I don't tolerate the presence of Trump supporters on my property, which could make dating complicated.
The latter. Cultural differences are an opportunity to learn. Political differences are an opportunity to argue.
What's the downside to shared political beliefs and different cultural background?
Different cultural backgrounds can be a burden sometimes. Like opposing religions, different beliefs/practices, etc.
I’m going to guess this sub is mostly college educated white Liberals and further left types that recoil in fear at the idea that white people in America have a culture. That’s why you don’t have an issue with
Different cultural backgrounds can be a burden sometimes. Like opposing religions, different beliefs/practices, etc.
If those were an actual problem, they would manifest as differing political beliefs.
I’m going to guess this sub is mostly college educated white Liberals and further left types that recoil in fear at the idea that white people in America have a culture. That’s why you don’t have an issue with
what
Well not always. Like for example in general two people with religious backgrounds can have issues with which religion the kids follow, which language a kid learns, interactions with extended family can be harder, etc. Similar politics doesn’t imply much to be honest.
Overall I’d say it’s probably easier if you share similar politics, but it’s hard to say concretely either way.
And that last part was saying White Liberals will constantly tell other people they don’t have a culture, shit on their own cooking, dancing, all that stuff. You guys actively seem to resent your own existence at times lmao, I’m not surprised you aren’t going out of your way to support other cultures.
White Liberals will constantly tell other people they don’t have a culture, shit on their own cooking, dancing, all that stuff.
This is like low-effort Candace Owens or Dave Rubin level analysis. What an embarrassment to reveal you've fallen for this sort of asinine rhetoric.
It’s true man! At least in the bay lol. Jokes about Mayo being too spicy, pumpkin spice flavored things, just generic shit like that.
It’s not some epidemic or crisis either, I mean they’re doing it to themselves lol
That's not saying there is no culture though. That's in fact jokes about the culture. Ie the culture doesn't have much hot spices on their food, and that pumpkin spice flavoring is very culturally popular. And that ain't white culture, that's being basic culture.
Oh that was just an example. I’m not saying it’s like hard-hitting analysis it’s just White Liberals are much more self-deprecating about being white than I would expect lol.
Different cultural backgrounds can be a burden sometimes. Like opposing religions, different beliefs/practices, etc.
If those were an actual problem, they would manifest as differing political beliefs.
Not all beliefs and practices are political.
Suppose you married nice liberal who didn’t belief children should ever be disciplined and should only experience positive reinforcement. No looking at the child harshly, no criticism…
Or maybe you married someone just the opposite who believed in harsh negative reinforcement and hardly any positive reinforcement?
Or suppose you were dating someone who believes family is overrated and had absolutely no respect for your parents.
Or maybe they respect their parents unconditionally even when their parents do and say things you can’t agree with.
Similar politics, no question.
The latter. The first option just sounds like dating your most horrible uncle.
I couldn’t care less about ethnic background.
I guess it matters what cultural background means. I don’t imagine I would have any trouble finding someone very close to me on cultural issues like how family relationships are supposed to work who also shares my politics. It would probably be harder to find someone with opposing politics that would be a match for me culturally.
The latter. A shared general worldview/outlook is way more important to me than being from the same cultural background.
My fiancée happens to be from (more or less) the same cultural background as me and has very similar politics, but I’d rather she be from a completely different part of the world than for her to have opposite politics.
I’m married to a woman with similar political beliefs, but who comes from a very different culture.
Honestly cultural differences aren’t a big deal. Sometimes they’re moderately inconvenient, often they’re fun.
But I’d never be with a Republican. She doesn’t need to be as liberal as I am (and my wife isn’t), but anything to the right of, I don’t know, Joe Manchin? No thanks.
How is this even a question?
Well considering I am queer, it would be absurd to date a queer queerphobe so similar political beliefs.
I think culture and political beliefs are somewhat connected. I prefer those who share my same values, which is usually going to include people who share my culture and political beliefs.
As long as they can share my values, then I'm not too concerned about the other things.
I'm a Black man, and I would date a liberal/progressive non-Black woman over a conservative/Trump-supporting Black woman easily.
Much prefer the latter. But it can still cause problems.
I don't think I could be in a relationship with someone with opposing political beliefs unless I bring them closer to my side. Otherwise, we would be too incompatible.
I have absolutely no preference regarding cultural similarity.
For politics, how deep are we going on 'political beliefs'? A disagreement over fiscal or educational policy, no problem. A disagreement over whether or not the holocaust happened, or whether or not trans people deserve to exist, that's a deal breaker.
I could care less about their background/ethnicity whatever else you think I should be worried about all I care about is if they’re a good person.
So relationships will last longer when two people have the same core values. To me this translates to political beliefs. And where I’m at, the majority of the men who are of the same cultural or ethnic bg don’t align with my political views. I kind get the sense that this question has some undertones (whether OP is aware or not).
I chose the latter in another comment, but there is an interesting additional perspective I can add here. Sometimes, being from a different culture to someone makes you more forgiving of their espoused politics.
I was raised in the US but I haven't stepped foot in the place for a little over 15 years now. Since leaving I spent periods of time ranging from six months to a couple of years in about a dozen other countries before finally settling on where I live now in the EU. I've done a lot of dating of people from other cultures.
One excellent example I can give is a woman I dated for a little over a year in Vietnam. Now, her politics were, defacto, very similar to mine; she had a very similar concept of social justice and believed strongly in our moral duty to other members of our society. At the same time, when I met her at least, she was very pro-Trump.
There at the time Trump was very popular due almost solely to his perceived tough stance on China. She didn't have the cultural frame of reference to see him at all outside of that very narrow context. As we hung out and she slowly started to see him through my eyes, her opinion naturally changed, because, in essence, Trump is really against almost everything she actually holds dear.
Now had she been a person firmly situated in western culture, another American-- or even a Brit-- the Trump talk at the outset would have been an immediate deal breaker. But the fact of her not really being situated within my own cultural frame of reference made me more forgiving of that stuff when I saw she was actually pretty freaking cool otherwise.
Just something that occurred to me.
Definitely the second. I can't get down with anyone who thinks 'won't someone please think of the billionaires!' should be the guiding principle of politics, or who hates gay/trans/brown people, or who wants to shove their religion down everyone's throat, etc.
Different culture
My political beliefs are equality for all, government accountability and limiting corporate influence.
Someone with opposite beliefs will likely (not guaranteed) be discriminatory, want their side of the government do whatever they want and let the rich control us.
I don't care if someone has a different cultural background from me. I've dated all kinds of people. However, they've all been on the same broad side of the political spectrum as me.
Political beliefs point to fundamental values, ethnicity and culture are just accidents of birth.
Easy decision that I have in fact made.
Absolutely someone with similar political beliefs. I refuse to associate with people who want to harm me and my loved ones, so opposing beliefs is not possible.
What the !@#$ is up with this question?
My political beliefs are "Be kind to other people, don't be a dick, make things better for everyone." I'm not dating someone that believes the opposite just because they wear similar clothing as me.
What kind of question is this? Of course someone who is more similar to me politically. If culture and ethnic background trump your beliefs, then you either don't actually care or got no spine.
Culture has the ability to define a person way more than politics. And I'm assuming you mean culture and not ethnicity. Most people aren't political activists and could care less if their partner votes for another candidate/party. Culture brings actual traditions into the home and if that doesn't match there is going to be a problem a lot of the time.
Easy, same politics. Those are tied to my values and culturally different would be interesting. But if I was with some conservative I could see us butting heads in a very non productive way
Same values matter most of all
Easiest question in the world. Same political beliefs, different culture.
I can get used to different cultures; I can't get used to being a second-class citizen.
Well black republicans tend to have a bunch of unpacked internalized racism so it’s a hard pass. That being said I would be more willing to talk about things like racism with a black republican than a white democrat
Same Culture, being a Christian is vital compared to being fiscally progressive.
The latter for sure.
not actually interested in dating anyone, but hypothetically, political beliefs are very important to me. cultural or ethnic backgound really isn't.
All these people pretending like different culture is no big hurdle are being unrealistic. Anyone who’s ever tried it knows there are subtle difficulties there. Not impossible, but growing up with similar childhoods is a big plus. Not quite as important as good childhoods of course.
As a libertarian the only “opposing” political belief would be if someone is pro big government. History has taught us that government is not the friend of minorities, even though popularly many have drawn the opposite conclusion.
Agreed. I also think people are really confusing someone's ancestral culture vs their actual culture.
Depends. It's a spectrum.
Center Right but from next door? Sure. Hard right but from next door? Absolutely not.
Liberal with nothing else in common? Probably not. Liberal but not a native English speaker? Of course.
Nuanced question - a lot of people aren't thinking carefully about it.
It is somewhat difficult to imagine a situation of "similar political beliefs" but very different cultural background for a liberal. This is because being a liberal tends to come with its own culture itself.
Like, I just don't imagine a Burqa wearing Muslim woman to have similar political beliefs as me. It's just not plausible.
Like maybe I can imagine a strongly religious Christian woman that's also sort of liberal. Our arguments likely would be around religious education for the kids - but if she insisted on high "indoctrination", is she actually liberal?
Confusingly, this question might make more sense for a conservative, where two people could both be conservative and have clashing beliefs and practices.
Someone with a very different cultural background. Otherwise my spouse would be very upset.
do political beliefs matter to you more, or cultural similarities Values are really what matter.
Cultural differences certainly create more challenges than most people realize, particularly when combined with language, but sharing values is what matters more.
Why would you be opposed to dating someone from a different cultural background?
Thats wild, man
Different political beliefs can lead to endless conversations as long as you're both able to converse rather than argue.
I don't know why different cultures would even be a question. Sure an introvert from Finland probably shouldn't be in a relationship with someone from Mexico that has three family reunions with 60 people every year. But that's more about personality than culture.
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