Am I The Jerk For Refusing To Change My Sexual Orientation Because My Entitled Christian Step-Mother Didn't Like It?

So about a month ago, I was sitting at the dinner table with my family, including my biological family and step-family. I said to my Dad "Hey Dad, can I speak with you in private for a moment?", my Dad finished eating what he had in his mouth before saying 'Of course, OP. Go to your bedroom and wait for me", so that's what I did.

About 2 minutes later, my Dad comes into my room and sits beside me on my bed. My Dad then said "So what did you want to tell me?", I took a very quiet but deep breath before saying "Well, I've been building up the courage to tell you this. But.....I'm gay......", there was a very long silence, I noticed my Dad was beginning to cry, I started to panic before saying "Dad, what's wrong?", my Dad then spoke saying "Nothing's wrong. I'm just really happy that you feel safe enough to tell me something that's hard to say", which completely melted my heart.

My step-mother then slammed the door open and yelled "HOW DARE YOU! I WILL NOT TOLERATE PEOPLE LIKE YOU IN MY HOUSE! GET THE F#CK OUT!", my Dad was baffled before he stood up and said to my step-mother "This is MY house, I bought it! And you have NO right to be speaking to my son like that! You can have your beliefs, but you have ZERO right to speak to MY son like that!" My stepmother was so surprised when she heard this because my Dad had never raised his voice like that.

It's been a month since this happened, and a lot has happened. I've introduced my boyfriend to the family, they like him. My Dad said we're a perfect match. But my stepmother has been non-stop belittling me because of it. My Dad's always been on my side during arguments about it, and I'm starting to get worried about their relationship. My stepmother's told me countless times that I need to be a 'civilized member of human society who stays true to god's teachings'. And every time, I've told myself I'm agnostic and that I don't believe in God.

So, r/AmITheJerk, Am I The Jerk for not changing my sexual orientation?

in AmITheJerkby Fun_Midnight_2826

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sezit

Every comment from her, look at her with pity and say: "I'll pray for you to come to know the love of Jesus." (Or Christian love, or compassion, or generosity, etc.)

Or quote her a bible verse about God's love. Don't try to argue to convince her, just shame her to shut her up.

Signal_Raccoon_316

"But I suffer not a woman to teach, nor to usurp authority over the man, but to be in silence" King James bible You pray she will one day find the grace to stop disrespecting your father, her husband, by so openly defying his will someday

Mueryk

Eh, stick with the Gospels. The one thing no Evangelical or whatever should be able to dismiss or minimize are the teaching of JC. They try cherry picking that and it is easy to shut them down.

sezit

This doesn't convince OR shame them. They just brush it aside with some backwards justification - a rationalization.

This type of verse doesn't impact them emotionally at all - because it's not one of the verses that they heard over and over growing up. It doesn't resonate emotionally.

But God's love, the compassion of Christ, etc. - those words do resonate, because they heard those terms over and over and OVER growing up. Those concepts are deeply embedded in their psyche. Telling them that you're praying for them to grow into the love of Jesus is much harder for them to brush away. Even if they do brush it aside, it makes them uncomfortable in a way that unfamiliar verses don't.

Making them uncomfortable is how you get them to stop. Making them argue or rationalize just prolongs your irritation.