How can I look more feminine

Other

Look, I get that I should be proud of my ethnic features. But I'm actually tired of people making small talk with me just to see if their nagging suspicion of me being a dude is correct.

It's definitely not my body, tho. It's my face. I have small eyes, arched eyebrows (my eyebrows are thin, but you can see the outline), eyebags, and some scars. But I think the cherry on top was my haircut.

I used to wear buns daily, and it literally gave me a face lift, I didn't notice until now. I had cut my hair really short, but not on the verge of being a buzzcut. My forehead is now normal, not huge like my ponytails tricked me into thinking.

So, based on all of this information, how do you think I can improve looking feminine without makeup or plastic surgery? BTW, I'm working on my wardrobe. I can't show my face because of stranger danger.

No pity compliments like (ur beautiful juat the way u are.I need honest feedback]

Edit: I hope you don't paint me as one of the girls who deny anything girly just to be 'different'. I have no access to makeup whatsoever.

in AdviceForTeensby HESTERPENNAS

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14d

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Busy-Two-6618

14d

I think some simple things you can do to be more feminine is adding some jewelry or a change of wardrobe, maybe getting a lash serum and trying to do light makeup, and maybe adding some nail polish or getting your nails done at a salon. Hope that helps

Michael_Knight25

14d

It’s not you, it’s people probably not being around your ethnicity and not knowing what your culture calls beautiful. You have to ask yourself if you really want to assimilate to/for a group of people that don’t respect you. That said find yourself a makeup artist that will teach you how to do makeup and a hair stylist. Also make sure that you’re body is fit. I hate this advice I’m giving you but it answers the question. Just think about the question I posed.

HESTERPENNAS

14d

Thanks, I'm African America and theirs plenty in America, so I should've never included that part

Michael_Knight25

13d

I’m black and that is an important part. Those people can either be racist or in the case of colorism people in the African Diaspora have been taught to hate ourselves over the course of many generations. Find someone who looks like you to talk about it.

GeneralDumbtomics

Trusted Adviser

11d

This.

GeneralDumbtomics

Trusted Adviser

11d

Hester, old white dude from rural SC here. Especially if you see a racial disparity in how people are reacting to your appearance, it’s got nothing to do with not looking “feminine” enough (whatever that means—my wife is entirely feminine, and shaves her head and doesn’t wear makeup). It’s got to do with deeper issues that are their problem, not yours. Trust me. I’ve never seen you and yet I feel confident in stating that you are beautiful. Be yourself and love life.

burn_as_souls

14d

I'd guess there's a combo of maybe you had a boyish haircut (which you did note something about hair) and don't discount that many people out there are shallow, unobservant and stupid.

In their eyes, they see a girl or woman not in make up and they think it's a boy.

Stupid and shallow. Very limited and traditionally societal views.

What you want to do before anything is think about what kind of guys are thinking you're a boy.

Are they the kind of guys who matter? The type you want to attract?

Because honestly, some of the prettiest girls out there can be in jeans and a t shirt with their hair tied back and no make up and look great off sheer self confidence and being comfortable.

In fact, to me and many guys, the women who are relaxed and themselves look better than the ones caking on make up, tweezing their eyebrows past the point of human looking and wearing the tightest clothes.

Not knowing who you are or what you look like, this is about all I can offer.

Don't change for others if how you are is who you are. You'll never find happiness chasing the acceptance of others.

Good luck, whatever you do!

MagikMelk

13d

Grow hair out is probably the most impact you're looking for. As a guy, I've never been called ma'am from behind until I grew my hair out during covid.

1401rivasjakara

14d

Not seeing you, I feel like long hair, makeup, jewelry and a fem attitude would help.

burn_as_souls

14d

I don't think long hair is needed. I've seen plenty of beautiful women rocking short hair.

Affectionate_Comb359

14d

Without seeing you it is really hard. There are many women with short hair who look feminine.

Earrings always help, especially hoops. You said no make up but mascara and eyeliner does wonders. Shading in your brows very lightly may help.

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14d

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13d

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blessitspointedlil

14d

Miracles can be worked with makeup. I’m sure there are video tutorials out there that could work for you.

HESTERPENNAS

14d

I don't have access to makeup

1401rivasjakara

14d

HESTERPENNAS

13d

What's wrong?

1401rivasjakara

13d

Why don’t you have access to makeup? I mean, if you are in America, there’s Walgreens

HESTERPENNAS

13d

All my makeup is in storage, most of my products are hand me downs frome my big sister.

Michael_Knight25

11d

What is your home situation like? It sounds like there may be some other issues going on

donnaeverywhere68

13d

Scarves always worked for me-- tie a pretty one around your head in a few different ways. Also the smaller, squared "neckerchiefs" look sleek tied around the neck, sort of like a choker style necklace. Old Navy has a lot of really pretty, inexpensive scarves, fyi. Good luck with whatever new things you try!