Aitah for Getting a family friend arrested for trespassing

320

Whoever let Lindsey get to 16 without bring able to read is the ahole and honesty ur family is for not helping her more

Electronic-Jicama-99

Yeah… what’s the long-term game plan here? How will she work, graduate school, etc?

Exactly she's fucking 16. They found out in 3rd grade. That's more than enough time. And they just gave up??

maroongrad

How to say someone is homeschooled by someone with zero educational experience...without saying that they are homeschooled by them.

Some homeschooling goes fine. My cousins were homeschooled, went to public HS and were fine. Some is an excuse to be lazy with people who can't spot any educational problems, don't know how to fix anything that goes wrong, AND REFUSE TO GET HELP FROM ANYONE IN THE EDUCATIONAL FIELD WHO ACTUALLY HAS A CLUE.

shamesys

I have a masters degree in special education and I can’t work with someone With severe dyslexia unless I have expert guidance. You need to retrain the brain to be able to read. Trying to homeschool a student like that is just crazy.

SnooWords4839

She has a learning disability that hasn't been addressed.

She may have a learning disability, and it's just not explicitly disclosed to her 20 yo cousin.

It was and they said they gave up on her

he was fucking 12 at the time, I'm reasonably sure he was not invited to the IEP meetings. How would he know what they did or didn't do?

-2

He's not 12 now. Neither is the rest of the family. Cause op said a much. but hey u defend a trash family for failing a kid if u want

-6

she may have a lesion on her supramarginal gyrus for all we know (which could 100% prevent reading). You think they were looping little Johnny in on his cousin's brain lesion? People don't tell things to 12 year olds because they're usually little assholes. That's why we build a whole ass extra school system to quarantine all the pre teens.

narrator was 12 at the time this was occurring, he's an unreliable narrator. (or it's fake)

So we're just gonna make shit up to justify the injustice this girl had done to her? It's clear form the comments op was part of it but u defend him if u need to. I'm sure that doesn't say anything about u.

-2

no, we don't know, that's the whole point. "the injustice" who's making things up now? you don't know her diagnosis.

Lol or she doesn't have a diagnosis and ur just making shit up. She's got dyslexia that's it. But again u defend the bad guys all u need.

dyslexia is a spectrum.

nm, this is stupid. bye.

Continue thread...

ScarletDarkstar

The text says he was 20, not 12. I'm not sure where you are getting this.

DawnShakhar

-1

Ever heard of dyslexia? In what medieval world are you living?

Some kids can't learn how to read in the regular school system. Most of them can be taught how to read with one-on-one special teaching, but some can not - it would be pretty much like trying to teach a blind man to distinguish red from blue. They learn by having texts read to them.

Blaming the family is ignorant.

Haha I have dyslexia and could read by 16 but go off.

Yes so ignorant to blame the family who op admitted gave up on the kid. Lol yall will excuse anything

DawnShakhar

So you are of the fortunate majority of dyslexic kids who could learn with proper help. Bully for you. That doesn't mean every dyslexic kid can learn how to read. As a former school psychologist as well as the mother of a dyslexic daughter (whom I taught to read when she was 9, after the school gave up on her) who is now herself a special ed. teacher for learning disabled kids, I happen to know what I'm talking about.

Lol yea no most dyslexic kids can read at least a little. Lol if ur a former psychologic ur a a shitty one cause ur siding with a family that failed and gave up on a kid. Oh so 9....which is before 16. The school and not her family gave up? U clearly don't know what ur talking about lol

DawnShakhar

Have fun without me, trolly-troll. I"m getting bored by your comments.

No trolls here but have fun calling anyone who doesn't agree a troll lol

-57

It's not like we can force her to lean how to read.

Pristine_Table_3146

My grandpa couldn't read. His school (1930s) finally told his mother it was no use to try any longer, so he quit in the 4th grade. He could write his name and write down numbers and that was it. He would write some of the letters in his name backwards, but this was long before anyone thought there might be a reason he couldn't process words.

shamesys

Op’s family is stuck in the 1930s. It was tragic for people like your grandfather and doing that to a child today is a form of neglect.

Pristine_Table_3146

His own mother was an orphan who never went to school at all. Her mother died when she was 6 yrs old, and she worked as a house servant for her stepfather's family. She never learned to read and write, either.

I'd hate to see regression back to those days when it was okay to keep a child working for their keep instead of educating them.

Right cause u can't force 3rd graders to do anything. Yall are pathetic

Top-Effect-4321

She’s a minor yes you can. Your family has failed her.

You can stop reading for her. You're enabling.

big_bob_c

Does Lindsey have an actual diagnosis of dyslexia or similar? Her parents should try again, they may be able to find a specialist in helping adults overcome illiteracy.

-30

She is diagnosed with dyslexia.

UnlikelyPen932

It's still possible to learn. Don't give up. I worked in adult literacy for over a decade in a public library where tutoring was free. Look up resources for her. There are different reading disabilities and there have been advances to techniques to help learn. Be that support for her.

aroundincircles

https://ls.works/

My daughter has dyslexia really bad, she is going through this program and it is helping. Their price is serious sticker shock, but if you contact them they have different pricing for non government agency paying parties. We’re paying $50/month.

-12

You are replying to the 20yo cousin of the 16yo who cant read.

Why in the world would you put this program on OP?

This is for her parents to figure out. Not some cousin barely into adulthood themself.

aroundincircles

Is her parents posting here? No? How easy is it for OP to pass this on? Pretty easy? Just sharing something that has been helpful.

big_bob_c

OP cares enough about Lindsey to defend her, he surely cares enough to pass a suggestion on to her parents.

That right there is actually fair enough.

Everyone else attacking and downvoting OP are idiots. Pointing their disdain at the wrong damn guy.

big_bob_c

I have family members who have dyslexia, it can make things really tough for all involved.

The_Crown_And_Anchor

Jay Leno

Billionaire Richard Branson

Tom Cruise

Albert Einestein

Sir Anthony Hopkins

Steven Spielberg

Tom Holland

Walt Disney

Keanu Reeves

You know what all these people have in common? They are dyslexic

Dyslexia is not something that prevents you from learning to read or getting an education or having a job

Its just something that you have to work through and manage

The fact your family refused to help this girl and allowed her to get to 16 without being able to read is frankly...unbelievable

FeekyDoo

what kind of parent doesnt know their teenage child can't read, sorry but her parents are pieces of shit!

ESH. While you're not the AH for kicking the family friend out, everyone has failed Lindsey. You don't get to give up when a child has delays.

OP is Lindsey's 20yo cousin.

How is her not reading anything at all to do with him?

-54

We didn't mean to give up.

I mean this is strait up educational neglect ...

A410821

Straight up - a strait is a narrow waterway

Sorry about that, typing on my phone and I miss things.

glitteringapplepear

you and your hillbilly family are full of shit

U didn't mean to give up? Are u fucking serious? "We didn't mean to we just all did cause we don't care"

sovietbarbie

sorry but OP is only 4 years older than her and her cousin how is OP supposed to actually do anything or make any executive decisions about lindsay's education, especially when the girl was diagnosed with dyslexia ???

SinnerIxim

Man I'm not sure why everyone seems to be blaming you, a 20 year old, for their cousin a 16 year old not being able to read.

Her parents definitely failed her IMO by giving up, but to think it's your fault that she can't read is just absurd.

Bittybellie

You didn’t mean to but you did. How is she supposed to function as an independent adult when she has this glaring problem? Your family is absolutely full of assholes that failed a child because things got a little tough. I hope no one else in your family had a child if this is how yall are

How is this any of the 20yo cousin's fault?

ffs people OP is not her parent or guardian.

Her reading is not on him at all whatsoever!

You were reading for her. Are you saying you accidentally starting reading her cards on accident? Are you saying every other time someone has read for her was on accident?

Odd_Connection_7167

-6

It might be best to give it up. This sub is notoriously ableist.

Is Lindsey special needs? How did she get to 16 without knowing how to read if she's in school?

ESH

You are not helping her by reading for her. They shouldn't have used slurs. Lindsey's parents are the worst for letting her illiteracy go on.

foriesg

-2

This isn't ESH he just asked her to leave.

You ignored how he's one of the people also hurting the cousin long term. He's an AH to the cousin. The cousin needs people that won't hinder her future. She needs assistance in learning to read and getting through the problems.

There are apps to point to written things to convert them to fonts that are easier for those with dyslexia to read. There are solutions. Instead they just go "well her future will just be fucked" and don't give the tough love needed to get a minor to learn or adapt.

foriesg

No, I didn't ignore anything it's not the 20 yr old cousin's job to make sure she's educated properly. It is his job to make sure she isn't ridiculed and teased. This guy was 11 -12 when it was discovered in 3rd grade. He's a cousin, not an aunt, uncle, grandparent, or parent. NTA

Standard_Bedroom_514

YTA for defending people who would neglect a teenager to the point of illiteracy. Wtf?

taa_scarlettfig

i have multiple severely dyslexic friends who can manage to read and write, are college students pumping out 8 page essays. your family has FAILED your cousin and they need to be investigated by cps💀you cant just "give up" because someone struggles with a skill that is a REQUIREMENT FOR SUCCESS. she will FAIL IN LIFE because you all gave up on her.

[deleted]

You and your family are the AH for letting her get to 16 without help. NTA for trespassing the crack whore.

yesimreadytorumble

CPS should take your cousin away. ESH

How is that OP's fault at all?

-13

Why

IvanNemoy

Because a 16 year old should be able to read at a 10 year old level, dyslexic or not.

Woodpecker_61

nta... I'd go so far as cutting all contact with this "friend" with the "behavioral attitude" toward the cops. That said, her fam just gave up trying ?? Never.

Jefflux

Explain more why Lindsey can't read. Noticing for the first time someone can't read at 3rd grade makes her 8 - 9 years old?

I would be concerned if a kid wasn't recognising letters at 4 and most decent parents have their kid doing counting and letters as pre literacy skills.

Does Lindsey have other issues preventing her from reading?

Additional_Train_469

Call CPS!!!! HELP LINDSEY!!!!! IS SHE HOME SCHOOLED? THIS IS HORRIBLE!!!!

FinalConsequence70

Things that don't happen: The police arresting someone for not leaving a party that the host didn't ask them to leave.

If you read the post, the host asked them to leave, then threatened to call the cops if they didn't leave, then called the cops ...

FinalConsequence70

I read the post. The OP, the 20 yr old male is saying HE told the guest to leave then called the police when they refused. OP also says he was AT a family reunion, which implies he's NOT the host.

-3

Well to clear something out. It was at my a house Without a co-signed with my dad.

FinalConsequence70

Then, you should edit your post. Because saying your AT an event makes it appear that it is at a place other than your own house. And you can't trespass someone from a place you don't own, so your post as is doesn't make sense.

You (a 20 year old) hosted the entire family at your own place for a family reunion?

fireflygal87

You make it sound like it's impossible 🤣🤣 it really isn't.

I made it sound like it's unlikely, which it is unlikely. Are you saying the majority of 20 year olds would be able to host the entire family at their own place? Because if not, then you're agreeing with me.

fireflygal87

You didnt make it sound unlikely, but impossible.

Where did I say impossible?

fireflygal87

Thats how it read

Continue thread...

Frogsaresupreme8

Everybody in this family has failed this poor girl ESH

divemachine

These fake stories are getting ridiculous. When will the AI chat bot learn that a family get together means that parents would be present, so a 20M calling the cops and the cops using a 'three point restraint' instead of a parent talking to either the family friend or the cops makes the whole story obviously fake.

MotherGoose1957

NTA. Irrespective of the history, if you ask someone to leave and they don't, and you warn them you will call the police and they still don't leave, and the police arrive and she tries to fight them, then you are definitely NTA for having her arrested.

DivineTarot

NTA

Bruh, if someone is that resistant to being trespassed, after treating a guest and family member of the hosts like shit, that they need to be given additional restraints, than you know they're shit and not worth shit.

Quick-Challenge6825

Reading these comments is heart breaking, and shows real ignorance.

I'm the mother of a 12yo who can't read. They attend a specialised school that we pay a lot of money for with 1:4 ratio of full-time learning.

OT and speechy also fortnightly (OT one week, Speech the next).

We read with them every night. While we are finally at the point of being able to read very basics, there's no way they could read cards for a game.

If I heard someone say those things to my child (teen or adult), it would be a lot worse than being told to leave.

Thank you OP for being so completely accepting and patient. The world needs more of you ❤️

Naejakire

I'm assuming this is rage bait because police don't arrest for Trespassing the first time they're called. The person has to actually be trespassed first.

Anyway, nta but the 16 year old needs to learn how to read.

Individual_You_6586

NTA

Your family friend was so unbelievably out of line that I wonder how she got out of there with all her teeth.

Samarkand457

NTA for calling the cops on the "friend". Who apparently decided that her theme music of the day was "Bad Boys, Whatcha Gonna Do?" Although I wouldn't call it ruining the get together. Free entertainment, amirite?

SinnerIxim

NTA, if someone refuses to leave when you have explicitly told them to then they deserve to get trespassed.

foriesg

First of all, what non-family member goes to a family reunion and insults a family member, luvky she was just arrested and not beat down. She deserved everything she got, disrespectful ASF

Ok-Duck9106

NTA and good for you, you did the right thing. She should have left when you told her to leave. She didn’t, so she was trespassing and if she was arrested, it was because she was still refusing to leave and likely being disrespectful to the police. You typically don’t get taken out like that unless you caused problems.

blucougar57

NTA.

Good on you. No one should ever be shamed for being illiterate.

bukak

-6

NTA. You’re a good person :)

-8

Thank you

Hey__Jude_

But you need to now step up and talk to your family about getting help for Lindsay.

I don't think you realize how serious of a problem this is.

Your whole family are just ignoring it, and that is worse than not ok. The longer this goes on, the harder it will be for her.

DO something!

M0NSTAAA

-1

YTA

Truth hurts eh

Strabge_Being2382

-2

Or you just a dumbass and assuming correct? So give us all the facts considering you know everything.... ohhh you don't but then again another reddit asshat that knows everything but most probably lives in mommies basement, just STFU clown, why is YOUR ASSUMPTION the right one? Logic and understanding are not your strong points