User deleted post
"Now that we have gathered our friends for a dinner party and just sat down, I'd like to discuss why you won't perform cunnilingus. What could go wrong?"
You know what? I’d attend that dinner party.
User deleted comment
15d
Lmaooo you demon
I’ll bring the tootsie rolls
Bwahahaha
Her boyfriend is bringing dingleberry pie for dessert
😂😂😂😂
"Can we discuss it during the fish chowder?"
With a tossed side salad apparently.
If the salad comes on top, i send it back
A+ 😂
🏅
Honestly, I would love to attend a party like this. As long as I’m just a spectator of the drama I’m so in
Oh my, the chowder has gone south
Pass the lingasagna
Excellent. As I've been waiting to discuss your butthole. Good thing we met each other and fell in love.
https://youtu.be/Fd_oQ5ocBdM?si=XI7fKkkx9M-fcKbr
If you’ve ever wondered how this conversation would go in front of a third party, here it is on international television
I actually busted out laughing when I read the part that this conversation took place in front of her friend😭OP was even the one who initiated and now comes here saying shes embarrassed. Either fake or some teen seeking attention/validation (cuz she made a mistake and now wants ppl to console her) lmao.
Either fake or clueless teenager
Definitely fake.
Idk prob just immature
Hahhahaha I imagine the conversation:
Friend: Blah blah blah (usual chatter)
OP: Hahahaha that's very funny *turns to OP's BF*: So why don't you eat my cuca anymore?
OP BF: *Chokes on his saliva* You smell like shit.
This sounds like something from The Room movie, the one from Tommy Wiseau.
Not old enough to know how to wash her own ass apparently. My mom used to say that to me when I was a kid. “You’re not even old enough to know how to wash your ass”
At least she's trying to find solutions. Been married 20 years and I won't do it from any position that will create a wind that wafts to my nose. Tried talking to her about it but didn't make a dent.
Not subtle but perhaps try hanging a little tree air freshener from your knob before she hops on next time. Either kills the smell or gets the message across.
Hahahahaha dude, this has me rollin’! 😆
This whole thread has me laughing like a hyena!! The dog is looking at me like, ‘WTH?’
Clip your nose shut.
Put a plug in it!
Tell her try suave anti bacterial soap not even being funny but it works wonders for stinky butts 😭🫶🏽
I had a wif hit my nose with a girl when behind a few months ago and I litterally haven’t been able to let that woman cross my mind sense I’m traumatized
Did you keep going or stop? I’m very curious 😂 I’ve read something like this on other posts and I’m always like did he just stop or.. ignored? Bc I would’ve said something! Like seriously how can a woman not know she smells before getting busy
Well it was before we fully started. I was in my drivers seat but hadn’t got in gear yet. so I de escalated the situation, chilled for a sec, and left
🤣😂 🫡 to your mom, that's a good one
Ha, my parents use to tell me that when I tried to act older as a kid. 😂
She does sound like she's in high school or fresh in to college. Though you'd be surprised how lame some adults can be.
You asked for it
Her BF humiliated her and now it's our turn
She humiliated herself who tf talks about shit like this in front of her friends
Obviously young since she doesn't know how to clean her ass.
Maybe she was hoping to use peer pressure on him
My thoughts 😭
I get that it’s embarrassing but I also wouldn’t wanna go down on someone if that’s happening. I don’t get why you asked him such a personal question in front of your friend if you didn’t want an answer.
Personally if I’ve gone toilet and haven’t showered, I’m not having sex. I shower daily of course but still would jump in to wash myself down there. Idk if that’s extreme but I wouldn’t feel comfortable with someone going down on me if I hadn’t.
My friend was told when we were teenagers that during sex he could smell her when he was behind and i think that scarred me enough.
I kinda think this way (though it kinda depends) and this is the main reason I'm considering getting a bidet
The main reason to get a bidet is to save money on toilet paper. You do feel cleaner too, but it was amazing how much our usage decreased.
I just installed one (installation sucked literal ass) but now im soooooo happy. Got the warm water one too ;)
If it's sucking ass, then you installed it backwards
No the main reason is to clean yourself. The paper usage is incidental. I pretty much use the same amount to dry off
Right? It’s a huge lifestyle improvement. If it cost more than tp it would still be well worth it.
I got reusable cloth for drying off and have seen others use dedicated washcloths. It's much better for the environment, feels better, saves serious money over time, and you never get random bits of paper on you.
I mean, at the very least, a quick freshen-up with a rag is polite.
At least a bird bath
I don’t get why you asked him such a personal question in front of your friend if you didn’t want an answer.
Because its a fake story and OP wrote themselves in a corner and/or didn't proofread their reaction-bait.
This. I mean my wife and I will have sex if she’s taken a shit and not showered after but has showered before she went to the bathroom. But I’m absolutely not going down on her and I’ll let my fingers and or a toy work the foreplay instead of my mouth.
But if she’s fresh out the shower, gimme 😋
User deleted comment
17d
Isn’t it great
Welcome to the Internet. "The internet is for porn."
Yeah fresh out of the shower is a guarantee, I’m not really about it otherwise. Having said that, she more or less feels the same about my dick and balls so it’s samesies.
After I get home from a round of golf, it’s a guarantee my wife isn’t even gonna hug my ass 🤣
Try tennis :-
Husband and I were literally discussing this last night. If I didn’t have the energy to clean myself up in the shower before we have sex, I would not expect him to go down on me, nor would he expect it from me, either. If he wanted to go down on me I’d just take the 2 minutes to clean it. 🤷
ya'll people need a fucking bidet, an enema, and baby wipes in your lives...
How does this information surface? Like before you go down on your wife you get out the questionnaire? “Time of last shit? … ok.. and time of last shower? Okay. Hmm… would you mind getting the sex toys out? No reason.”
Post shower is the best😂
Ask wet wipes!! I always use wet wipes before, it’s also good to reduce the amount of bacteria that could lead to a UTI .
Shower your parts PRE sex, its not pleasant going in there with sweaty/shitty parts.
i can’t believe this has to be said. do people really not wash themselves if they know they’re bouta get freaky? even if i’m going on a icecream date i wanna smell and look as best as i can
Did no one learn from that video where the girl throws her panties at the guy, guy proceeds to sniff said panties, and then gags? 😂
I'd suggest both taking a shower before doing it, that's a good habit to set. I'm really self-conscious and careful about hygiene so I never did anything before my partner and I have taken a shower.
Yes, it was wrong of him to say it so bluntly in front of people(it should stay within your relationship's privacy), but also did you ask him that in front of your friends?
Och God that is such a nice habit! I always feel weird or guilty for asking a partner for us to get a shower first... ;d
The bar is really fucking low apparently. When my girlfriend and I got together there was an adjustment period where I did have to bust out the "oh that sounds like such a nightmare!" when she'd get confused and a little frustrated because I declined sex and oral because I hadn't bathed yet. She gives me blowjobs like she's handing out candy so yes I'd like to have a clean dick before otherwise it would be embarrassing, unhealthy and shows her 0 respect. It's also not as if she can't snap her fingers and I'm up and ready just sometimes depending on the situation gotta put a pin in the sexy time until I've had a shower.
Goes along with not wanting to get sick from e coli or cause any uti's. Also both should take a piss afterward to avoid uti's or prostate infections.
As a dude I find it largely impossible not to piss after sex.
Moderator removed comment
16d
Bidet. Use a bidet every time. It doesn’t matter if you shower every day if you take a shit after you’re going to smell like shit no matter how well you wipe.
My flirtatious way of ensuring everyone is squeaky clean is just saying "hey wanna take a shower with me?". If they say yes then it's just more foreplay, if they say nah you go first then that's fine because I know she'll shower without me strictly saying go shower and if they say no then huh needless to say I ain't going down anywhere and am now a bit scared.
and the fun can even begin in the shower :)
How in the heck did that subject come up in front of a friend?!
Being a dumb teenager probably?
Maybe clean your asshole? I personally shower every time and thoroughly wash my asshole, and I’m a straight man, I just think it’s a matter of respect to them. However, it’s understandable because no one tells you really how sex is, especially not porn
If you aren’t going to shower then use a bidet or baby wipe. Clean yourself up especially if you expect your dude to go down on you.
This post smell like a shit.
I now get the saying, “One slip of the tongue and you’re in deep shit” Makes sense to me now.
As the old joke goes... what does a woman's asshole and a 9 volt battery have in common?
You know it's wrong but you're gonna put your tongue on it anyways.
Don’t smell like shit? Properly wash your ass lmao? This is not rocket science. You’re a grown ass woman, practice some proper hygiene especially if you’re engaging in sex?
Mf presented 3 statements as questions
Excuse me your honour, I'd like to question the witness. Mrs Peterson, If you don't mind:
properly wash your ass lmao??
thank you for the thirty seconds straight laugh
😂 Mf was spitting tho!
True
😂
User deleted comment
17d
Taking a shower after each poo seems wasteful. Just buy a bidet. I have a handheld one and it's great. Saves on toilet paper too.
It would be for me because I shit 10+ times a day and would never get anything done because I'd always be in the shower 🤣.
**I have active Crohns Disease which makes you visit the bathroom a ton
I could smell your asshole is CRAZYYYY 😂
Bacterial vaginosis is a thing, but I have a hard time believing you wouldn't notice if that was the case.
You know how in movies and shows the lady's often excuse themselves to freshin up? You should both be clean for each other. Spontaneous sex has an inherent risk of body smells but that should be the exception not the norm.
Talk to him about how you want to get your hygiene fixed so you can enjoy each other. You need to make sure you are in a place where you can accept him being honest with you and he needs to not withhold that stuff that makes him uncomfortable.
At minimum freshen up with some baby wipes back there if you know something is about to happen between you two. Helps with freshening up.
Lmaoo people really need to use bidets and baby wipes. Can’t believe this is a problem people are having in 2024 🤯 nasty work using tp only lol
I was reborn when I found out about baby wipes. For the first time ever I didn’t feel gross after pooping. I’d always over wipe and irritate my whole bottom and still feel gross afterwards. The unfortunate side effect of this awakening is that I literally can no longer use regular toilet paper to wipe and always carry baby wipes with me.
Just FYI though, baby wipes are not flushable and can clog up plumbing or even entire public sewer systems.
This 100%. I know people just dont care and will flush them anyway but flushable baby wipes can ruin your plumbing.
Your plumbing. Your neighbors plumbing. Your neighborhoods plumbing. It's not just yourself that's affected
Yeah, it's a bit of a con calling them flushable, but the wipes companies stand behind it saying they're not doing anything wrong, because they are, indeed, flushable, meaning that if you put them in the toilet and flush, they go down.
They aren't wrong, technically, but as a plumbing contractor, I will tell you that in my house, my kids and my wife KNOW they better not be flushing baby wipes or dad will lose his mind. Those things cause all manner of grief.
I've always kept a bin with a lid for baby wipes next to the toilet for my whole life.
I've had people shame me for that because apparently soiled wipes in a closed bin is some disgusting practice.
I'm convinced people are just disgusting and don't know how to take care of themselves.
Haha .. my parents immigrated from Sicily so post-poop hygiene was paramount in our household. Had a bidet installed and baby wipes etc growing up. I remember sooo many of my friends making fun of me/us for it… then mfers try it ONE time and can never go back to tp only 😭’brooo you were so right’ .. like yeah it’s not a hard concept to grasp. Dry Paper doesn’t clean shit (literally) lol. Glad you’ve found the light
I always find it weird that it's quite usual to just wipe with toilet paper. I mean, if I got sh** on my fingers or any other part of my body I would wash it off with soap. Have you smelled your finger if you get a tiny amount of poo on it and washes of quickly? Have to do it at least twice with lots of soap.
Same happens behind. You go to the toilet and just smear it out with paper inside the whole walley. Until theres nothing left on the toilet paper. Of course it smells! I would never feel clean if I used toilet paper only if I had poo somewhere else!
Eat more fibre
You may shower every day, but do you wash those areas just before you have sex? Have a quick wash from the sink beforehand. That will solve the problem.
Either that, or he's a lazy sod and he's pretending you smell to get out of giving you head.
I was thinking the second part too. If that's the case he needs a dumping (pun intended). Either way, time to normalize bidets in the west.
It happens, especially when younger or if no one tells you..it's okay. Just shower every time just before sex.
Damn girl, clean that ass
I’m ded 🤣🤣🤣
Why would you post this? Wash your ass lmao
Lmao 😂😂😂
So you’ve been complaining to your friends that he won’t go down on you, clearly multiple times for your friend to say that infront of your boyfriend, and yet you didn’t think to, oh idk, maybe have a civil sit down conversation about it months ago instead of growing resentful over it?
Asking him is one thing but did you tell him how it’s making you feel?
Introduce showering as foreplay.
Maybe wash your ass
Serious question, I've only come across this subreddit recently but it seems to be entirely for young teens to ask questions. Is that what it's always been like? All the questions are the same stuff
He was wrong to not communicate this with you earlier, and you were wrong asking him such a personal question in front of your friend.
Is this a non-bidet-user issue that I'm too bidet-user to relate too?
Well I was once doing 69 with an ex and she had a cling-on staring me directly in the face. That was a tricky situation to get out of quickly. And she was a hygiene queen so I guess it happens. Next time be extra careful.
Before doing the dingdong, have a shower and use soap conscientiousnessly.
Showering on a daily basis is great, but not showering between a poop and an oral session is really nasty in terms of the smell, the fatty moist, the thought of it, and self consciousness.
Furthermore, when not properly cleaned after a poop, the smell rises up like a shadow from the grave when going doggy style. The guy won’t tell you and will do it again just because his penile area doesn’t have taste buds or smell ability. Guys usually turn on a fan or open a window for some draft. Or they start panting and blow the air away. We don’t talk about this enough lol.
Remember: your rectum is as far as possible from your mouth for a reason.
I’m sorry girl but I don’t blame him. If you smelled like shit he’s obviously not gonna wanna go down on you. You asked you got your answer use this to up your hygiene
How about instead of typing your little reddit post you take a fucking shower and wash your ass LMAO
Facts
There is no reason to feel ashamed. Human bodies have smells, and that will include your anus (and your vulva for that matter). Your bf's genitals also have their own smells. Just make sure you are being hygienic, and if he doesn't like how your body smells that's just a hint of incompatibility, not some kind of personal flaw.
Any tips on how to make it smell fresh down there?
If you think maybe you aren't getting rid of all the fecal matter make sure to wash your anus, gently, using soap when you shower.
he made me feel humiliated and embarrassed in front of my friend saying that
You asked him about going down on you in front of your friend, so that's on you. If you wanted a private conversation you should have asked him in private.
Facts
Did you poop that day?
If you pooped and didn’t shower before sex, that’s disgusting and that’s your problem
Exactly I think it’s disrespectful to allow your man to go down knowing you took a dump and ain’t freshened up lol
wash yourself with soap & water before AND after sex. if you can install a bidet on your toilet, do it. if not, you can get one of those portable bidets. if you’re in a pinch, use a wet wipe. if you are hairy down there, you may want to shave that area? i find that hair holds on to body odor.
why would you ask him that in front of your friends lol
I mean that part is on you 100%… and that situation is totally fixable. be glad he’s honest.
Get a bidet and never worry again. Blast to clean everything.
Search on Amazon. Match ur seat design.
I don’t like cardi b but she has a good video clip out on the world of the internet where she describes how everyone should was their ass….
Lmfao
Op now that you have this knowledge you should wash your ass
My bf told me I smell like shit
Quick! Run and ask for advice from a bunch of uninvested randos on Reddit instead of addressing the problem directly with your fella! Under NO CIRCUMSTANCES should you EVER communicate directly with him about it! That would be MADNESS!!!
This reminds me of when my ex coworker said "sorry today I might smell bad because I'm wearing the same shirt and I had a hot pot last night"
I replied to him "it's ok because you always smell like shit"
and he burst out lmfao
lol....you had a conversation about why he doesn't eat you out in front of someone else?
What the fuck is wrong with you, besides not washing your ass that is.
You asked this question in front of a friend??
Clean yo booty hole with baby wipes when u shit. Finger yo booty hole with a very soapy hand in the shower
I must have a gross husband because nothing would stop him from doing that.
Why are you talking about your sex live in front of your friend? That should be a private conversation, do people not have basic manners anymore lol?
Find a guy who's into that lol
Dear god, work on your hygiene
It’s crazy that this isn’t common sense nowadays.
Looking at you especially, comic con goers! 🤢🤮
Could be something else going on. Maybe follow up with your doctor to see if everything is in order
Wash your ass. Take a shower everyday. Use some feminine wash. Tell your bf to give it another chance. If you want him to go down on you again.
I live in the tropics, showering immediately before sex is just standard protocol, it's not fathomable to have sex otherwise.
One thing I haven't seen on here is warning about infection. Strong odor from nether regions can indicate on urinary infection so you should console gynecologist.
However if that's not the case, you should definitely freshen up before sexy time. And most importantly: WASH YOUR ASS TOO!
Not just over but also let the water in and let it run out for a bit. It also can be the cause of bed smell, not just vagina.
My boyfriend loves eating me out, but we always shower before he starts.
Sometimes I’ll shower and he has that look in his eye and I just know what is coming next, lol.
How does he smell when you give him a bj. Is he clean also?
Well, you need to have better hygiene and keep these conversations private. Showering doesn’t equal you actually washing your ass. If you smell, you smell. Look up tutorials and follow them instead of posting on Reddit.
Make sure to actively wash your butthole.while showering. It must be difficult on showers where you can remove the head though.
The issue is men and women do not notice their own funk but I can promise you others can. It’s necessary to be able to have these conversations bc god forbid you go out in public and some stranger says it. He could approach it differently but you gotta think our crotch (and asshole) doesn’t see sunlight regularly and sweats. even worse in the summer. So now that you are aware, maybe freshen up if you know something is about to kick off. Sometimes you don’t have the luxury I get that. Heat of the moment is just that. But you could also remind him his dick smells like cheese and maybe it will resonate he was offensive in his delivery.
That’s just wrong. Speaking from a male perspective, I will admit it’s an acquired “taste.” But after a little practice, it’s something I kinda look forward to!
All you can do is get a quick shower before you get down to business. Maybe lay off the Taco Bell (or any Mexican food, really). But that’s all. Just clean up a bit and let him chow down. Beyond that, he just needs to man up.
First of all let’s point out how he said it in front of YOUR FRIENDS?????? Honey that’s so wrong. He should’ve taken your feelings In to consideration!!
The women I've been with that really enjoy it washed immediately before. If it's a pH problem, there are creams that work very well.
User deleted comment
16d
cocoa butter but avoid the sensitive bits of course. Just put it around the area and use baby wipes instead of smearing everything down there with shitty paper. Put the cocoa butter on after a shower and you'll stay fresher longer.
Tell him it was prob his breath.
Wipe your ass with baby wipes make sure there’s nothing down there at all
Wild Guess: He just said it to embarass OP, like she did by bringing it up in front of others. What was she expecting?
Lume damn
reported, this shit was around like a week or so ago, shitbot
Wipe better? I've read that lots of women dont actually wipe themselves properly from like those people that do waxes.
I always go to the toilet before sex, first of because I often need to pee and I hate feeling full during sex and second I always "wash myself" a little down there after the toilet so I feel fresh and I'm fresh for him:)
Scrub that butthole
How does that even come up around friends
don't smell like shit then stinky.. and don't ask dumb questions like that if you aren't ready for the answer in front of a crowd.
Why the fuck are you asking that in front of friends
- Why on earth would you bring that up in front of your friends??
- Look at your diet. Things high in acidity can make you smell funky. Check your PH and stuff.
- Make sure you’re wiping correctly. And washing your butt crack when in the shower.
- There are some supplements that are said to help with scent and taste. But i dont know the validity of them.
- Suggest you both shower before engaging in oral activities. You can even shower together to get things warmed up.
Just shower before. Everybody gets stinky down there sooner or later. A bidet or bidet hose is also a great thing. Walk around with fresh butt all day. It's life changing.
Regardless, that was really unkind for him to 1.) say that to you like that, and 2.) in front of other people. Are you sure this guy is good to you?
Wash yo damn ass. What’s the problem here?
So you asked in front of your friend and are embarrassed, which of course you are, anyone would be. And now you're here on the internet asking us how to wash yourself? 😔
Although he was rude, you asked the question in front of your friend. I guess he felt comfortable answering.
Go to the Dr. You may have an STD or an infection. Eat more fruit. And use wipes if you go #2. It's so much more hygenic or get a bidet .
Happy cunnilingus
Invest in a bidet. Everyone's asshole will be happier.
Are you overweight?
Clean yourself, no one likes that assy smell.
Wet wipes, when a shower is not an option. Keep the individually-wrapped variety in your bag for traveling convenience! (But don't flush them, no matter what the packaging says).
have you tried, perhaps, not smelling like shit?
Why. The fuck. Would you ask that in front of people?! The fuck?
I'm sorry but I'd ditch the BF, what an incredibly rude thing to say and in front of a friend. To answer your question shower before activities, don't use any extra scented stuff as it's not good for your PH. You could also see a doctor if you're noticing your own smell and it seems bothersome.
I don’t know either if you shower everyday how are you smelling like that are you washing your behind & he didn’t have to say it in front of your friend he should’ve told you in private Summer Eve Feminine Wash also they have the wipes to & Body Spray good luck stay blessed🙏🏾
Fake
Female here- After every poop use wet-wipes to get all excess debris, keep a pack in your purse or backpack, or use water on TP if you dont have any. Plus always Shower before sex and scrub the bum hole good 😊
Who asks questions like that in front of friends? How old are you?