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Don’t. If he liked you enough, he would ask you. If he is that insecure, you dont want him.
Movie dates are horrible. Just tell him you two are now going out romantically, and ask him if he has any objections. That's all.
Just ask him! He might be glad you did it first, there’s nothing wrong with it
Just ask. Odds are, you'll completely make his day
"Hey, I really like you, would you like to go on a date with me"
Well how did you start going out as friends? Did he ask or did you? If you asked then you already have your answer basically
Don’t ask - say you want to see him and plan a day and ask when he’s free next.
By asking him. You can ask in literally any way imaginable.
no no no.... Yes, ask him but not literally any way imaginable. That's how guys don't understand because she'll say "Did you notice that new place was open?" and think that means she asked him out.
Just be straight forward like you were in your post. It is literally that simple and be straight forward and don't mask things.
Guys don’t pick up on hints or innuendo .. be very direct … shoot your shot ! Good luck !
Don’t. Let it evolve to a date you may scare him off, too much pressure for a shy guy. Let nature take its course.
Wrong. Shy guys can just be waiting for the other one to take the lead and OP could make their crush’s day. He most likely won’t be scared off.
If he’s shy and into you, he’ll be so happy that you made a move. If he isn’t into you in that way, at least you’ll know. You miss 100% of the shots you don’t take. Take a shot!
Just tell him that maybe you should have a proper date next time. I am 100% sure that you will make him the happiest!!! There is no close only friendship between men and women, obviously he wants more, so no need to be nervous! 😁
Like the time Julia Roberts was in friends she said to Chandler “how many more times do I have to touch your arm before you’ll ask me on a date?”
Just kinda ask him? I come off as "shy" sometimes and the amount of moments where women have held my hand or casually sat on my lap and I thought "Oh, she's just being friendly" is horribly high. Just ask in the most direct way possible. Try "Hey, I like you. Would you like to go on a date with me to the movies?" Simple. To the point and very direct.
Just as a little post script: EVERY TIME we realize that handhold or other affection afterwards we kick ourselves repeatedly.
Absolutely and by the time we realize it, it's a little too late..
Say "You should take me out on a proper date next week". If he can't figure THAT hint out, then you are dealing with mentally challenged male.
Just straight up ask him. I’m an extremely reserved guy, and I’m telling you he will appreciate it so much. If you feel like there’s a connection, just say “Hey if you’re free this weekend wanna go see a movie , and grab dinner afterwards , I’ll wear something cute lol” that way he knows where this is going. Or say something funny like “Movie date and then dinner this weekend , you and me , 6:00 , be there or be square”
Say it in person, you have no idea how much he’ll cherish that deep down as a man.
You could do what this girl did to me, ask to hang out then 15 minutes in tell me "you know we are on a date right"
How did you take that?
Mild shock, but it worked. Then she friend zoned me so she could go back and bang this ugly dude that cheated on her multiple times and she aborted like 5 of his kids in a 6-7 month period but I’m sure it will be different for you.
Yo could you give us like a couple seconds heads up before you break our necks from whiplash?
My bad, I overshare a lot
Nah, you're good, I tend to use sarcasm a lot which is difficult to discern over the internet
Well that came out of nowhere!
Ya I really wish our mutual friend didn’t tell me about all those abortions when she was drunk. Really feel like I dodged a bullet
This is hilarious bro
If you asked him to go to the movies without mentioning dating, what would be different?
I am pretty bold, so I would probably just say something like:
“Hey, any chance you’d like to got to the movies with me on Saturday? Like, on a date?” Or I would just go out with him and kiss him at some point. That would get the point across! 🤣🥰
Be honest. Tell them u are shy but u like them
He might be stressed when seeing a text, you sure you can’t just ask him casually to go with you to a cinema when you meet him next time? Going out as friends don’t differ that much from dating, if you are compatible and eager to get closer then you will, no need to call it a date
Just ask him he'll b delighted..coming from retired shy guy
Good one
Retired? How long have you been in business?
4 days
You should just ask, I’m pretty anti social and if I’m just hanging out it feels like a date in my head. But really what you should do is just hug him and kiss him at the end of the next one and not mention it like it never happened. I’m not sure but I feel like that would drive me into a mental insanity.
Shy guy here. Make it as clear as possible. “ hey, I really like you , romantically that is. And I want to go out on a date with you “
Shy guy here. Even when my girlfriend ASKED to kiss me I had to be like ummm you first lol and In my head I was still thinking like “should I? Does she really want that” even on the first “date” I always flaked so I would def bring it up in person maybe flirt a lil make sure he’s comfortable with you then go in for the kill Nahm sayin
I would just try and say it the same way you have been asking each other to go out as friends. Make sure it's a horror movie and use every single jump scare opportunity to jump into his arms and cuddle him
Just ask him, but it must a horror movie. And then u dine in nearby. His heart will beat faster after watching horror movie, and seeing u across the table, his brain will think this heart drumming falling in love...
“Hey I really like you, can I kiss you?” With your hand on their knee or shoulder works great for men and women.
Since he’s shy and already going out with you, he probably already likes you. Go for it, just ask how it’s in your mind!
I'm here to copy what y'all saying 😂😂😂
Tell him straight up. Especially as a shy guy, don’t beat around the bush (if you give hints, odds are he’ll miss them or notice then self consciously disregard them). Also wouldn’t recommend doing it through texts (tell him in person) and maybe a first date with more interaction (coffee?) might be better than the movies.
Shy guy here, or rather I was shy when I was younger. The problem is you’re already going out as if you’re dating, which happens a lot when the guy is shy. Can’t tell you how many times I ended up “dating” a friend, but never managed to get any farther than that even if I knew she liked me. It was just too hard for me to put myself out there like that.
So my advice to you is keep going out with him, and don’t make a big deal about making an official date. But also don’t wait for him to make a move, because he probably won’t. Just wait until it feels right and either kiss him or say that you want him to kiss you. Sure you might get shot down, but I don’t think that’s likely. He wouldn’t be spending so much time with you if he didn’t like you.
"Hey, would you be up for a movie after the food? I really want to see (movie name)."
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13d
Yeah, but she said she wanted help with the wording. This is my suggestion.
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13d
Yes, this is my wording for asking the shy guy out on a date. You think it needs the word "date?" I don't. I think that just would add to the pressure.
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13d
I understand. My old gf had to hand me her number on a piece of paper and ask me to call her. She said she'd been watching me for three years. But this is as far as I'd go in a text. Once she gets him in person she can be more particular. But, this is just my suggestion, feel free to make your own, if you haven't already.
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13d
In many cases it can be. In my case things were bound to happen because a) her English was only fair, and b) she had a baby, so it didn't occur to me that she was also going through a divorce.
Edited to add: but I wouldn't have noticed anyway due to internal thick-headedness.
However you decide to do it, keep it casual but still engaging. If he’s quite shy, the pressure of an official date could be a bit overwhelming. At the same time, if you wanna keep seeing him and he wants to see you, you’ll want it to be fun.
All in all, keep him reassured that there’s no pressure and also be respectful of any boundaries he may have :) good luck!
I think the opposite. She needs to put pressure and hard shove all-in here. When you try and beat around the bush with a shy guy nothing really gets accomplished. It is good to establish it as a "date" to set expectations.
I hear you and that’s totally valid. In some situations it can be good to be assertive, but as a shy guy myself, that sort of thing can scare me and put a lot of pressure on me to change the way I would normally act to fit their vibe.
I would prefer if someone came to me casually so that I know I can feel comfortable being myself, yk. Maybe OP could mix assertiveness with reassurance?
Oh, just text him something like, "Hey, you wanna stop being a pussy and come fuck my brains out at the movies? I'll even let you pay for my overpriced, stale popcorn. You know you wanna stick your face in my taco, so just man up and text me back already."
Or you could always try, "Hey, I've been thinking about your shy little face and how much I want to see it buried between my thighs. Wanna take me out and watch a movie while I grind on your dick? I promise to make it worth your while. Let's do this, you little bitch."
Just remember, the key to getting what you want is to be as vulgar, degrading, and disrespectful as possible.
Smhu😂😂
You are a true modern poet. So eloquent, so beautiful.
A real cunning linguist.
I salute you.
Cunnilinguist
Lol 😂
Be direct
Movie date is bad. I’ve done that before. Do not do it. Could be awkward
Really? If he’s a shy guy and they already have history I think it’s a good idea. It’s an opportunity for some mild flirting so she can make him more comfortable and there’s not the added pressure of having to talk right away she could really ease in the fact she likes him since it’s an actual date he may be more nervous and more awkward? Just a dif view point
The same. I prefer to hang out with a coffee date. We can chat to know each other more.
Yeah we didn’t get to know each other better than before. So we pretty much left as the same people. Lame as hell. Never doing tht again
Plus.. you just can’t leave. I mean you could but that’s terrible. Do something easy. Coffee, drinks or ice cream. If you don’t vibe you are able to leave.
You don't need to leave the movie, though. Unless you decided to see something lame in the first place.
Pretend you don’t love him when you really do
Anime 101
“Hey shy guy, let’s go out on a date”. It’s as easy as that.
🤯
Sounds like you’re the shy one 😂
I’m the one that has also made the other plans lol, I am shy but he is too I’m just the one that makes the main moves. The difference is I usually tell him in person and we go after work this time it would be our day off lol.
I stand corrected.
I think you're already dating. Let him know that you've been enjoying spending time with him and that you don't intend on spending time like that with other people.
Way too risky. If it turns out she's wrong, now she's the creepy one. Better to just ask, get it out in the open.
They may be but if the actions are never taken, it will likely dissolve. It may be safer to mention some buzz words because I don’t see either of them going in
Lol, 100% this. OP doesn’t realise shy guy already thinks they are dating. 😂
so smooth
its easy,just ask him out in person.
casually say there is a movie you like to watch,you pay for the tickets and he can get you both the snacks.
for dinner,go somewhere modest and enjoy the meal. let him send you home and before you guys say goodbyes,give him a peck on the cheek (or lips) and thank him for the date.
sounds like rom com i know but you never try,you never know.
Be weird about it. "Yo Yo Swag! Wanna yanno grab sommie pCorns and coke and head to them moves???? Capish"
Get Yoshi to be your wingman, obviously. Worst case scenario, you catch him in an egg.
I’ll say he’s a lucky guy, you care about him, just ask him out normally, don’t think too much or overthinking
THIS. Overthinking is the enemy of decisive action (or pretty much most things in relationships).
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14d
Who do you think has made all the other plans? Him? Lmao
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14d
I’ve made every plan he just always says yes without hesitation they’ve all been after work though this one would be on an off day which is what makes it different
Most men aren't that complicated, and appreciate honesty, and direct communication.
Just literally tell him (in person is best, but if you are too shy, even online) "I like you, and would like to go out on a date with you. Would you like to"? (or even end with "...like to go do XYZ at place WXA on that day at that time").
If you want to make more of an impact, add a compliment explaining WHY you like him (as long as it's genuine, doesn't have to be anything fancy)
Also... for the love of all that is sacred and the left nut of Cthulhu, please do not give him subtle hints or play games or try to manipulate him into asking you out. First, most men are really bad at picking up subtle hints, especially from women (especially if he's shy, introverted and not super experienced with women). Second, men appreciate NOT having to guess. Leave the mystery to your fantasy entertainment.
This right here.
DONT DO IT THROUGH TEXT. You hang out all the time. You talk during those times I’m assuming. Just say the words how you would if you were talking about something you guys chat about.
Just do it
Hey, do you want to go out on a date?
Just say “hey, had a blast last time we hung out. Did you want to go on a movie date with me?”
thisss^ short, and to the point.
Hopeless romantic here. Tell him you like him for the love of god. We men are fucking dumb sometimes when it comes to reading if a woman is into us especially if we have some confidence issues. Just ask him out.
Say something like
We've been spending alot of time together and I've grown close to you and realized my feelings are growing to be more than just friendship Do you feel the same way?
Then touch his arm and smile. then it will start gently raining while he gasps from the shock and takes a step back surprised. His face growing red as he Stammers over the jumble of words and thoughts trying to break through the dam that are his lips.
And that's when you lean in and peck him lightly on the cheek and walk away. With a wistful playful smile as he stumbles and bumbles around recoiling from what just happened. His feet working quickly to follow you letting out an unintelligible stammer with each step. He reaches out and grabs your hand and lock step with you. Face red and eyes bright.
Congratulations you got yourself your future husband 😁
Me dedicated and focused enough to actually write an entire story 😂 no sorry to dash your hopes. Just random flights of fanciful writing when the moment hits me right
You don’t. Weed out the gene pool.
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14d
He’s weak.
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14d
Ask a geneticist.
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14d
You can’t bring logic into arguing with idiots like this - they’re talking absolute nonsense
That man is indeed a lucky man. Hope it works fine for both of you
You could maybe ask him about what type of movies he likes to watch, and you could steer the conversation to the new movies that are currently out and say how much you like to go. If there’s one you have in mind, ask for his opinion on it and if he thinks it’s worth watching. Shy guys are the sweetest, I’m sure he will be overjoyed!
On behalf of shy guys, unless he doesn't want a relationship, I'm almost certain he will light up and love it if you ask him directly.
My girlfriend and I started as just friends, and we had initially made plans to go shopping and get lunch about two weeks in advance. Things started to get more romantic than 'just friends' and she straight up asked me "Do you want to just call this a date?", and the rest was history. At the time I had a huge crush on her and was hesitant to ask because I was afraid I'd blow it or make things awkward, and I was so happy she did the hard part.
That is so cute! Congrats!
“Wanna go see _____?”
Just slide into romance. No need to define things so early. It might mean gradually, over many hang outs, getting slightly more affectionate. Drop non-verbal hints. At some point, though, you’ll have to make a move like holding his hand or snuggling into him.
Trust me, being shy doesnt mean we dont enjoy a bit of direct communication.
Just be honest, speak it how it comes to you, if they want to go out with you im sure they'll get the message.
“Hey, let’s add a movie to our meal? I’d love to see (titles), but I’m open to suggestions!”
"hey Would you like to go on a date with me"
I did this with a female friend by inviting her to a concert and then making sure that she understood that it would be a date, not just 2 friends hanging out. She was very happy about that.
Pretty sure he'll be happy with you making things clear.
So like you stated to her that it was going to be a date?
Helen I would like to take you to the movies next Saturday night. I’ll pick you up at seven ok?
Helpful advice !
Yes. I wanted it to be 100% clear that it was a DATE.
Girl, if that man has been going out with you as "friends" for a couple weeks and you guys are alternating PAYING????? He is your man already. Go get him.
Wait, I don't understand. Plenty of people pay for each other when hanging out, whether in groups or just two. How does that mean anything? I wouldn't mind paying for my friends for example.
The way I see it is if there's a man and a woman who have been going out one on one for a couple weeks, and when they began hanging out the man took it upon himself to pay the whole bill and she had to introduce the splitting of the bill, he wants her so bad or already thinks they are on a date and he SHOULD be paying. Of course there is nuance and not everyone is like this (like you said lots of people pay for each other). But I feel like I can safely say the majority of men, if they're paying for your hangouts, they are doing so because they feel it's a date/they like you/they feel compelled to do so in order to impress you.
First it started with just him paying which caught me by surprise and then I started saying no it’s on me sometimes
To his face, say “would you want to go on a movie date together next week?”
Tbh if you two have been alternating paying, he might already think you’re dating or has at least wondered about it
I’m that shy guy. Honestly I’m glad you are even thinking about make the first move. Not a lot of girls do this. Good for you. Don’t be nervous just be straight forward. Ask if he would like to go catch a movie someday. That simple. Don’t over think or make it more complicated then what it really is
For a second I thought you where the actual guy she was talking about lol
🤣🤣🤣🤣
“Let’s go see a movie this weekend, these three sound interesting “.
Asking him out normally i think is fine. If the problem is: how can i make him understand that i like him not just as friend? Maybe you could make a move. For example by getting closer to him or head on shoulder while watching the film. He should understand... if not, well just say that you like him
Don't text him. Ask him to his face, directly. And don't beat around the bush when you do.
If he is shy, you will be doing future you and him a big favor by making it clear it's what you wanted. Don't leave him room to wonder if you're actually interested.
"would you like to go on a date with me on Tuesday at 730?"
Ask him because somebody else is thinking of doing just that.
Just do it. It’s 2024, and a strong woman who asserts herself is straight up fire. I’m sure you’ll come up with the right thing to say.
"hey, you got a movie you're looking forward to seeing?"
-> he replies
"How about movie at x time?"
Hey u wanna go out to get some coffee or something? No pressure but I think you’re cute .
Saying no pressure but ai think youre cute I think is too much if the guy is shy. First sentence is perfect
Maybe we can go to the movies after ?
Well doesn’t matter how you ask it matter you ask
You can either go straight to the point: "Hey, are you free on Saturday? Let's watch a movie or go for coffee together."
Or drop a hint for him to take it: "Hey, there's this new coffee shop in town, and I'd love to go, but I don't want to go alone...". With the little help, he now might gather some courage and "invite" you instead so he can feel like he's inviting you.
Courier pigeon
What if it goes to the wrong guy? 🤔
Foolish of you to think I only have 1 pigeon.
Just don't release them all at once I can imagine there being a shit parade which would be sending the wrong message!
well, realize youre shy too. you seem so. also, dont do it via text. do it in person. help keep him calm through it all, and tell im you'll be there for him and never think bad of im. that oughta fix it.
You talk to them as if they were any other person
Go up to him and say "wanna hang out in my room with the lights off and see what happens "
If you're worried about the wording confusing him just throw the word date in there. Call it a movie date rather than just saying want to go to the movies with me. Wanna do a movie date with me etc
Agreed 100%. I feel like 'date' shifts it from platonic to romantic. Unless he's crazy he will get the hint.
Hey! would you like to go watch a movie with me?
Im a shy dude. I guess just ask him normally. I wish theres a girl who thought of me
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