The second man dies
Two men walk in to a bar. The first man says “I’ll have some H2O.” The second man says “I’ll have some H2O too.”
He did not get poisoned so that is a plus
More of a H+
I think all jokes should end with, “The second man dies.” When is that ever not funny?
How many vicars does it take to change a light bulb?
The second man dies
A man walked into a bar. He says "ouch!"
A seal walked into a club. The seal dies.
Guy walks into a watchmaker with a broken watch. Watchmaker says the second hand died. Might take you a minute to understand.
A guy walks into a T- shirt shop to get his shirt colour changed. Asks the guy at the counter if he can do it. Counter guy points to the guy at the back of the shop and says the second man dyes.
Why did the chicken cross the road?
The second man dies
A priest, a suicide bomber and a rabbi walk into a bar. The bartender asks, "Can I get you guys Kamikazes?" The second man dies.
I’m the third man to read this and I grieve for you.
Almost always. It’s a joke!
A man in a clock factory falls asleep on the job. He was putting in too many hours. A fire starts. The second man dies.
Two guys enrolled to be minutemen. The second man dies.
Second hand dies.
Kid Rock opens a Record Label and music shop in Detroit. It blows out all competition. Second Man dies.
God being the eternal Timekeeper interviews three watchmakers attempting to enter heaven.
He asks the first guy what he did. Guy says, well I set clocks to record hours. God says, yea that makes sense, enter.
He asks the third guy what did he do. Well you know when you hear people say, just a minute? God says, yea what of it. Guy says, while I’m the guy that calibrated clocks to record those increments. God, says, well that’s pretty small amounts of time in the big scheme of things. Oh whatever, go on then, you’re in.
God asks the next guy what he did. Guy says I made clocks that would keep track of breaking minutes down into sixty increments. God asks what kind of minimalist would do that and why not 10, or 100 increments instead of 60. Guy says well, no good reason I just randomly chose 60.
God looks at the guy with contempt and says and what did you call these insignificant, trifling periods of time? Guy says, “second.”
The second man dies.
That's a pretty blonde joke
The second man says what are you a moron I'll have a beer.
Offended, the first man pulls out a gun and shoots him. The second man dies.
He can't escape his destiny in the joke
There were two men. One man printed custom designs on a t-shirt. The second man dyes.
The bartender, having a rudimentary understanding of both grammar and common sense, deduces that the second man meant "H2O also," "rather than "hydrogen peroxide," and thus serves both men water, avoiding potential muder charges.
Everybody who drinks dihydrogen monoxide dies.
That's true. However, those who drink dihydrogen dioxide die much faster.
Not always true! If the guy who drank the hydrogen peroxide, pulled it a gun and shot the water drinker several times, the H2O drinker would almost certainly die first.
As long as they're on tap
The second man says "and I'll also have some H20". The first man is disappointed his murder conspiracy failed.
OH NO
The second man dies because h2o2 is hydrogen peroxide. One does not simply drink h2o2 and go on to live long and prosper.
The first one clearly had better chemistry with the bartender