Is it bad that I made my dad avoid me now all bc I don’t want him slapping my but??

I 17 yo female finally spoke up about how I feel about my dad slapping my but for no reason and when I told him how I feel he called me cold and bitter all bc I don’t want to be slapped there and he goes and says “would you rather have me slap you behind your head?” And I just wanted to say “maybe just don’t slap me at all for no reason?” But couldn’t cause it’s hard to stand up to my dad so when I did all I did was just say “I don’t like it” and then went into my room.

The next hour we left to head to my grandmas house for a family get together, I had fun, but my dad was just avoiding everyone, barely talking and he always talks to his family. When we left to go home, my mom took me in her room and discussed what happened earlier. She wanted to make sure he didn’t do anything inappropriate to my based on my actions earlier but in reality I just don’t like it when he does that. Ik he’s not a pervert, can I not just say I don’t want that happening to me?? “He’s just messing around” THERE ARE MANY WAYS TO MESS AROUND!!! Now he won’t talk to me. He won’t pickup his baby daughter bc of what I will think, but I DONT THINK THAT AT ALL. Is it my fault??

Edit: I been seeing the comments under this and I understand why you guys think that way but to make it clear he ain’t like that AT ALL. Now ofc you guys are gonna say he is. The way I told him all annoyed and upset made him think I see him as a pervert which I don’t, but his words did concern me. I have been playing his game at avoiding each other and not talking bc what I did, I don’t think was wrong and I don’t need to apologize. My dads behavior led him to distant himself from his family a little, he would be in his room and come out for like an hour or 2. I don’t know how long this will last but at this point I don’t really care bc my focus is on school, I don’t need to worry about this. My dad can talk to me and tell me his actions are in the wrong. He isn’t a pervert, he’s been doing it when u was young in a PLAYFUL way not in a weird way, but now that I’m older I don’t want that. My family might not see a wrong but it’s a boundary I don’t want anyone to do to me.

in amiwrongby Beautiful-Advice-420

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markhughesfilms

2mo

You aren't required to stay silent and let men -- your dad or anyone else -- touch you or hit you etc for any reason in any context if you don't want them to, period. The fact he's acting like a spoiled brat throwing a tantrum is because he expects you to give in and put HIS feelings ahead of YOUR OWN, that even if you don't like something physical you should endure it anyway and not complain because HE wants to do it, and I'm sorry but that's a HORRIBLE SHITTY attitude to have in general but it's ESPECIALLY shitty for a father toward his own child. And he's manipulating you AND taking out his infantalized shitty behavior on another child too, which is beyond excessive.

His behavior is bad enough I highly recommend you show him this thread & that other adult men are telling him to stop being a dick, stop being a shitty selfish adult who takes out his childish behavior on his daughters because one of them told him not to slap her on the butt.

And I'm very sorry to have to tell you this, but however "innocent" it may seem, he's your dad & you're 17 yrs old and if he's getting mad because he can't slap your butt anymore that's a BIG red flag about his sense of entitlement toward you and your body, maybe not sexual but STILL reflects a very common and unhealthy attitude in men, especially men with kids. The very fact he got ANGRY at you and is STILL holding a grudge only makes it look even WORSE, so if he wants to stop projecting the impression of a dad trying to get his daughter to let him touch her butt, he better grow up or a LOT of folks are going to get increasingly suspicious of him.

TELL HIM THIS. SHOW HIM THIS THREAD. If he's a decent guy and wants to be a good dad, he'll be horrified that his behavior has been so bad and is creating an increasingly bad reputation for him, and he'll apologize and straighten up. If not, then you know he's a very different man and father than you thought he was or he claimed to be. To the dad -- STOP SLAPPING YOUR DAUGHTER'S BUTT AND THEN STOP ACTING LIKE A RESENTFUL SCHOOLBOY WHEN SHE TELLS YOU SHE DOESN'T LIKE IT. You're a father, so ACT LIKE IT.