I am not shaming polyamory in any way. It is just something I cannot do. Any guy I have been with, I have been met with the threesome question. Even in my marriage, my now ex asked for one and cheated when I gave the boundary of no. I am now with someone who has cared for me deeply. I have explored everything intimately with him consentually and happy to do so.. and then the threesome question came out. I put down my boundary, and it kept coming up. I would say no and no and no. And now he is wanting to compromise with no physical one, but me writing about one to him for smut purposes… because he feels ostracized when I tell him I am monogamous and would leave out so he could go experience what he wanted because I am not compatible in that way. He does not want to lose me but I cannot physically write about me with other girls or other guys. At least right now. It is pushing me away and I don’t know if I am in the wrong her. I am not turned on by this and I don’t even know what to do anymore.