My boyfriend and I have had mismatched libidos since the start of our relationship. He struggles a lot with anxiety and sexual aversion, which he attributes to traumatic experiences in previous relationships and not anything I've done.
I want to be supportive but I find myself having a really tough time understanding where his boundaries are. While I do have a high libido, I'm also just a very physically affectionate person and enjoy all kinds of non-sexual touching like hugs, cuddles, kisses, etc. Recently any time I get too enthusiastic about snuggling up to him he'll get upset and accuse me of trying to escalate to sex. I've explained to him that I enjoy this kind of touch on its own and that I don't view it as foreplay or as a prelude to sex, but he doesn't seem to be reassured. I am pretty much always in the mood and would happily escalate to sex if he were interested, but I would also be very content and not disappointed at all to just enjoy a heavy makeout session that didn't progress any further than that.
The low point was a few nights ago when I started kissing him too passionately and he pulled back with annoyance and asked if we couldn't just hang out without having sex for once. I said I wasn't hoping for or expecting sex at all and he snapped that making out is sex as far as he's concerned.
I have accepted the difference in our libidos and am willing to work around it but the prospect of a relationship where I can't even initiate a kiss with my partner seems bleak. Please help me understand what I can do to make him feel more comfortable.