SO yeah, I can't think of specifically off the top of my head what the exact epiphanies were for me but I have had a few moments were I suddenly found or had someone else put something in different terms and suddenly something clicked like a puzzle and I was like "OH
OH, SHIT???
OH."
and then you realize you're not crazy or extra fragile for being traumatized by what happened to you because it was a lot more fucked up than what you were telling yourself happened which was already pretty bad.