as a kid i always felt neglected, as i grew up this feeling never went away, in fact it always grew. it's so painful.. i don't know how to deal with the feel of deprivation.. i constantly feel like i'm trying to hide and pray to disappear so i won't have to deal with someone else being praised. I do not seek attention at all,nor do i seek praise , i just always felt like my brothers are better than me. also my parents are primitive so they always reminded me that i'm a girl and i have to do stuff while my brothers don't. (cleaning, cooking, achieving, taking care of younger brother, can't go out with friends, they put my big brother on a pedestal... and a million more things) i know that the neglect i felt as a child effects me by wanting to constantly be alone. but the feeling of never being enough to anyone, not only family but friends, relationship, even at work.. i feel so alone and i don't want to. i feel lost when i feel neglect and i would like to change it. do you guys have some tips? ideas? maybe even books recommendations? thank you so much and sorry if i have spelling issues, english isn't my first language.. feel free to correct me respectfully.