what are the words to avoid when comforting someone?
• "kumalma ka" • "'wag ka na malungkot" • "'wag ka nang magalit" • "kaya mo yan" • "malaki ka na, dapat..."
When comforting someone, it's always best to let them speak. You can let them know you're there for them by listening, you're not any better by telling them how they should feel, what they should or could do, you should never make them expect that everything will be alright or anything at all. Makinig ka lang nang mabuti yung pinaka mabuting magagawa mo. Hangga't 'di sila humihingi ng gabay at tulong sayo, 'wag mo ibibigay. Kapag nagsalita sila na gusto na nila mamahamak, manakit maging ibang tao at lalo na sarili nila, doon ka lang magbigay gabay, ituro mo ang tama, o humanap ng interbensyon para sakanila. Huwag mong iparamdam na galit ka sakanila, hinuhusga mo sila, o ano man.
Short and simple, when comforting someone, hindi nakasentro sayo ang usapan at lalo na sa ibang tao, at wala kang alam sa pakiramdam nila at sa mangyayari.